


On Cameron Mitchell

by evesharmony



Series: On Cameron Mitchell [1]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M, First Time, M/M, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-08-22
Updated: 2007-02-04
Packaged: 2017-10-13 05:09:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 22,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/133319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evesharmony/pseuds/evesharmony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.<br/>Dwight D. Eisenhower, US general & Republican politician (1890 - 1969)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. On Leadership

She laughs when he sits her down for the talk on rules and orders and how he’s supposed to make them and she’s supposed to follow them and not the other way around.

She laughs again when he storms out.

 

He doesn’t see her again until breakfast the next day where she’s picking bits off of Daniel’s plate and Daniel is letting her.

 

“So how was Jack’s place?” Daniel asks as Vala’s fingers dart in between his to grab a hash brown.

 

Cameron frowns.  “Well, there was the limb-tearing monster, and having to spend quality time with General Landry, and a whole duck-watching thing, and . . .”  Cameron trails off, distracted as Vala steals a piece of toast.  “Are you going to let her eat your whole breakfast?”

 

“Hmm?  What?”  Daniel glances at Vala.  “Give me that.”  She dutifully hands over the half eaten piece of toast, which Daniel promptly shoves in his mouth.  Vala grins indulgently at him, and then winks at Cam.

 

She’s teasing him.  She’s teasing him with her blind obedience to Daniel’s request for toast, which Daniel doesn’t even recognize the significance of because, well, it’s not the meaning of life kind of stuff, at least not for Daniel, and Cam can’t say anything because that would be acknowledging that the whole situation bothers him.

 

He digs into his breakfast while Daniel eyes Vala warily.

 

“Well boys, this has been a slice of heaven, but I’ve got to run.  I’ve got important things to do, like online shopping and something called ‘fan fiction’.”  She gives them a blinding smile and before Cam knows it, she’s sashaying out of the commissary with his fruit cup.

 

“Hey,” he calls, but doesn’t get up to go after her.

 

“Rule number three, Colonel,” she calls over her shoulder.  “Always keep your eyes on your berries.”

 

There are a few muffled snickers and Cam looks over to see Jackson grinning at him.

 

“Shut up,” he says and steals Daniel’s fruit cup.


	2. On Enemies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”  
> Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 - 1900)
> 
> "A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies."   
> Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 - 1900)

“Go go go!” he yells as they make a break for the stargate.  Daniel goes down from something that looks like a zat blast just as he’s reaching for the DHD.  Carter drags him to cover just as the second blast hits the dialing device.

 

 _Jesus fuck_ he barely has time to think before he’s diving for cover as well and it sounds like the whole planet is blowing up and falling down around him.

 

****

 

“Mitchell, wake up.  This isn’t a day spa you know.”

 

His first thought is to wonder why someone with Vala’s voice is talking about day spas.

 

His second is to wonder why he feels warm and floaty and . . . wet.

 

He jerks upright and opens his eyes, water splashing around him.

 

His third thought is that he’s naked.

 

Vala stands nearby, wiping her face with her sleeve.

 

His fourth thought is the realization is that she had to have been damn close to get splashed by the shallow water he’s sitting in.  Naked, by the way.

 

“Vala,” he intones.

 

“Mmhhmm?”

 

“What am I doing, naked, in a tub, in a room with you?”

 

“Oh, are you naked?” she asks brightly, stepping forward.  “I hadn’t noticed—“

 

He holds up a hand to stop her.  “Oh no, you stay right there and answer my question.”

 

She thinks for a moment.  “Soaking?”

 

He pins her with a deadly look.  “Why.”

 

She crosses her arms and glares back.  “Perhaps the guards took offense to your odor.  You have been tramping about in the woods for three days.”

 

“How did we get here?” he tries.

 

“Well, I can’t be certain as I was unconscious as well, but I believe we were captured, brought to this cell and stripped of our clothes.  All I know is that I woke up in the bath with you.”

 

Wait.  “With me?”  And then he finally sees that she’s not wearing her uniform—she’s barefoot with white pants and tunic.

 

“Yes.  For awhile I thought you were faking being unconscious just to cop a feel.”

 

Oh God.  He doesn’t want to know.  He focuses on the space behind her, sees a shelf with another set of clothes.

 

“Clothes,” he says, nodding at the shelf.

 

Without a word she retrieves the spare clothes and he’s just about to get his hopes up that *just this once* she’s going to follow an order.  Until she stops and bites her bottom lip and gets a truly evil glint in her eye.

 

“Actually, I think you’re going to have to come and get them.”

 

The sound that comes out of his mouth is nothing short of a growl.  “Vala.  Bring.  Me.  The clothes.  That’s an order, by the way, in case you can’t tell.”

 

She mock pouts at him.  “I didn’t hear you say please.”

 

“I swear to God you’ll hear a lot more than that if you don’t get your butt over here now.”

 

“Now that’s more like it,” she grins and starts stalking toward him.  Despite his effort to remain calm, the panic must show because she stops and tosses the clothes at him.  And laughs.

 

“Why Colonel, I had no idea you were so modest.”

 

  

  1. Probably both literally and figuratively.
  



 

He distracts himself by examining his new clothes.  They look handmade, and are surprisingly soft, like well worn cotton.  Clothes.  Check.  Towel . . .

 

“Anything around here to dry off with?”

 

“Would you like me to take off my pants?” she asks in all seriousness, tugging at her waistband.

 

Cam rolls his eyes.  “Forget it.  Just . . . turn around while I get out.”

 

Her brief pause gives him ample time to think about what he will do if she actually refuses to turn around.  He can always just jump out and give her the fully monty, and that might be enough to shock another woman into silence, but this is Vala.  Vala will use it to embarrass and mock him at every turn.  And there is always that ‘eating him alive’ part that he’s sure he’s not ready for.  Or he could just sit here quietly pruning away and defending his honor until their captors come to rescue him.

 

Vala turns to face the wall, impatiently tapping her foot.  “You know, if I were in your situation I would be more than happy to have a beautiful woman staring at me.  In fact, there was this one time on—“

 

Cam quickly tunes her out, certain that’s not a mental place he needs to go right now, and climbs out of the tub.  He uses the shirt to pat himself dry and pulls on his new clothes.  His eyes are glued to Vala’s back to check for peeking.  He finds himself relieved and disappointed that she doesn’t even try once, and has to clear his throat to let her know it’s okay to turn around.

 

“Well,” she says, hands on hips, eyeing him critically.  “If I’d know these outfits were see-through I would have stayed out of the light.”


	3. On the English Language

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur."  
> Doug Larson

He’s bored.  He’s eaten all the peanuts, watched the movie (which he’s already seen *twice before*), scanned through the magazines, and read through his report to make sure that he isn’t missing anything important.  Like a way to actually stop the Ori.

 

He is so bored.

 

Cam glances at the book on the table.  It’s either this, or Vala.

 

He picks up a pen.

 

“Whatcha doing?”  She appears suddenly at his elbow.

 

`"It's called a crossword puzzle." `

`"Oooh, I love puzzles.  How do you play?" `

He grits his teeth.  `"Well, you get a clue and how many letters the word is, and you have to figure it out." `

`Vala stares at him expectantly as if to say, "That's it?" `

`"The trick is," he continues, finding himself defending something he doesn’t even like simply because it’s Vala asking, "Is that the words go horizontal and vertical to form an interlocking grid.  If you get a word wrong, it could throw out the whole thing." `

`Her expression doesn’t change.  After a moment, in which she apparently decides that no, he isn't joking, she says, "Sounds like something Daniel would enjoy." `

`"Well Daniel isn't the only brains of this operation." `

`Vala tilts her head back and studies him closely.  Then she grins.  "Fine.  Let's play." `

`He opens his mouth to explain that the clues are full of cultural references and word play which, she reminds them every day, she often doesn’t understand.  Instead he looks down at the first clue.  `

`"One across:  Gen. Robert.  Two words.  Four letters."  Cam grins.  "General Robert E. Lee.  Got it in one."  He looks to Vala but she just rolls her eyes at him.  `

`"Of course you got it - it was a military question.  Next." `

`Definitely not making an effort to hide his deflated ego, he reads the next clue.  "Healing ingredient in moisturizers.  Four--" `

`"Aloe," Vala says without pause.  `

`Cam` ` glances at her from the corner of his eye.  `

`"What?  Do you really expect me to slather something over my entire body without reading the ingredients?" `

`And now he is definitely not making an effort to *not* think about Vala and slathering. `

`"Fine, Miss Smartypants.  Prefix with logical.  Six letters." `

`"What is a prefix?  Why would you want to pre-fix something anyway?  You do it once correctly and then it's fixed." `

`"A prefix is a part of a word that can go in front of another word.  Like . . .social.  You put the prefix anti in front, and it becomes antisocial."  He’s sure that Daniel could have explained it much better, and in painstaking detail, perhaps painful enough to bore Vala and cause her to go away.`

`"Well in that case, here is your prefix.  Il.  As in 'illogical' because that is what your language is." `

`"Vala."  Long pause. `

`"Yes Colonel Mitchell."  She’s examining her fingernails in that universal way women do when they’re feigning nonchalance. `

`"You speak the same language." `

`"Ha.  Hardly.  For a week I was asking where I could find a jeneva and no one knew what I was talking about.  I finally had to draw a picture." `

`He doesn’t want to rise to the bait, but the crossword is starting to mock him.  "What's a jeneva?" `

`"Apparently you earthlings call it a vibrator." `

`"Vala!" `

`"Quite crude and simple, really.  Jeneva is a much more . . . pleasant word.  Just rolls off the tongue, don't you think?" `

`He really doesn’t want to. `

`"God, Vala, just . . . stop talking for a little while." `

`"You know, that's the same reaction I got from Daniel.  I had no idea all the men on this planet were such prudes.  Surprising, considering all the phallic imagery you surround yourselves with."`

`“What do I actually have to do to get you to do what I say?” he finally blurts.`

`Vala has the grace to look shocked for about one second before her lips curl into a loose interpretation of a kind smile.  “There, now that wasn’t so hard, was it?”`

`He glares and pushes back from the table, seeking escape.  Vala, never one to take a hint, follows behind him.`

`“You know that the first step is admitting that you have a problem.”`

`He spins so suddenly that she jumps a step back.  “Yes.  Yes, Vala.  I have a problem.  With you.  Your insubordination and complete disregard for the chain of command, your harebrained schemes, your outfits, your petty theft, your constant meaningless chatter—“  He cuts himself off abruptly, wondering if he’s gone to far, knowing that it wouldn’t be totally undeserved if she slapped him right there and then.`

`“My outfits?” with incredulity.`

`Oh shit.  Had he actually said that part out loud?  And of course that would be the one she would zero in on, rather than the insults.`

 

“I wear the same boring green uniform that you all do!  Which does *nothing* for my complexion, by the way.”

 

He prefers the blue himself and can’t believe what he’s about to say, but it comes out anyway.  “But it’s different.”

 

“How is it different?”

 

“You just . . . you wear it . . . different.”

 

She also looks like she can’t believe what he’s saying.  “Different?  As in I’ve-been-wearing-it-backwards-and-everyone’s-too-polite-to-tell-me different?  Or I’m-the-untrustworthy-alien-pretending-to-be-a-member-of-SG1 different?”

 

He stops.  Blinks.  Wonders if he missed something, or if the train really did jump the tracks that suddenly.

 

“You know what,” she says, backing away.  “Just forget I even said anything.”

 

She sits down at the table and picks up the crossword puzzle.  Cam knows that he should say something; he’s the leader of SG-1 for Christ sake, and despite what everyone thinks, she’s ultimately his responsibility and not Daniel’s.  Still, he remembers enough about the big sob story she gave Daniel about being a host in order to get him into bed, to be wary.

 

And then a flash of understanding hits him—bright and sharp, the kind of epiphany that’s usually reserved for Sam and Daniel—that maybe if they treated her like she was always telling the truth, she would.

 

“Vala—“

 

“Not now, Colonel Mitchell.  I’m concentrating on this incredibly difficult earth puzzle,” she says in a clipped tone without looking up at him.

 

He sighs and retreats to his seat.

 

The remainder of the flight is short, but the pointed silence from Vala grates on his nerves almost more than her constant opinionating.  The only sound is the occasional crinkle of paper.  When they land, she’s up and exiting the jet before he even gets his seat belt unbuckled.  The crossword book is sitting closed on the table and he picks it up out of curiosity, flipping to the puzzle he’d just barely started.

 

Every word is filled in.  Incorrectly.  And the damn thing is, every single word fits.


	4. On Temptation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."   
> Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

“Will someone please explain to Vala why we can’t play spin the bottle?” Sam says, obviously exasperated.

 

“It’s against regs to fraternize with your fellow officers,” Cam explains, returning from his kitchen with more beers.

 

Daniel holds up his hand.  “Ah, that won’t work because—“

 

“Only you and Sam are military.  Which leaves Teal’c, Daniel and myself to fraternize all we want,” Vala finishes.

 

“Indeed,” Teal’c says.  Sam throws a pretzel at him and he graces her with a small apologetic smile.

 

“How about because I’m the boss and I say no.”  All four of them turn to stare at Cam with varying degrees of incredulity.  “Fine,” he relents.  “I’m not the boss but we live in a democracy and the majority votes a resounding ‘no’ to spin the bottle.”

 

“Come on, it sounds like fun.  I would gladly kiss any of you,” Vala informs them.

 

Cam tips his beer at her.  “*That* does not surprise me.”

 

The glare she aims at him is less her usual ‘silly earthling’ look and more of an ‘I wish you to die immediately’ look.  She’s been doing that a lot since their flight to Washington, in between all the ignoring him and the . . . well, the ignoring him.  Daniel, who’s had too much to drink to be so damn perceptive, frowns and glances between Cam and Vala.

 

Cam can tell by the look on his face that he’s about to call them on it, too.

 

“Well as much as I’m sure I’d enjoy kissing you, Vala, I have to get going,” Sam says, shocking them all into silence.  Even Vala, though she looks less shocked than . . . surprised?  Amused?  Curious?  And as grateful as he is for the distraction, now his imagination has a whole new track to swim in, complete with beer and lesbian porn and—

 

“—particle accelerator.  I told General Landry I’d have my notes ready for him first thing tomorrow.”

 

“Right.  Particle accelerator,” Cam nods, without a clue what she’s talking about.  “Don’t we have tomorrow off?”

 

“I too will depart now.  Thank you for a pleasant evening, Colonel Mitchell.”

 

Cam scrambles to his feet, casting a quick glance at Daniel and Vala who aren’t making any move to get up.

 

“How about one more round?  Come on, guys.  I feel a win coming on.”

 

“I do not believe that to be the case, Colonel Mitchell.  You have many tells which prevent you from winning.”

 

Daniel chuckles and Cam spins around only to be caught up in a smug, easy smile.  Sam and Teal’c receive an absent wave on their way out.

 

“Is that how you cleaned me out tonight, Jackson?  Been studying my ‘tells’?”

 

Daniel purses his lips against the grin.  “Actually, it was Vala.  She gave us a few tips when you went to the bathroom.”

 

He turns his eyes on Vala, expecting another smug smile.  Instead she fidgets, looking uncomfortable.  “It was nothing,” she says quickly.  “Come on Daniel.  It’s time to go.”  Vala begins to stand but Daniel reaches out and drags her back to the couch.  She actually struggles and Daniel puts his arm around her shoulders but he’s staring intently at Cameron.

 

“Something is going on between you two.  You need to resolve it before other people start noticing.”

 

Vala huffs.  “Who are you, Dr. Phil?”

 

Daniel’s nose wrinkles in distaste.  “You’ve been watching Dr. Phil?  What about all the stuff I gave you?  The—the documentaries and the movies?”

 

“They were boring.  I was amused by Dr. Phil’s rudimentary grasp of the human condition.”

 

Cameron snorts.

 

“Anyway,” Daniel continues, “Please stop watching Dr. Phil.  And talk to Colonel Mitchell.”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Vala insists, crossing her arms over her chest.

 

“Sure you don’t,” Daniel says, squeezing her closer and gifting her with an affectionate smile.

 

Again Cameron is struck by the ease between them and wishes he could pinpoint exactly when it started.  One minute Daniel’s threatening to strangle Vala with the chin strap from his boonie, the next he’s saving the seat next to him at briefings and helping her get into her tac vest.

 

He’d be lying if he didn’t admit that it makes him wonder if Daniel is getting into anything else where Vala’s clothing is concerned.  He’d be lying if he didn’t admit that maybe, lately, he’s been wondering about it a little too much.

 

“So we can crash here for the night?”

 

“What?” Cam and Vala blurt simultaneously.

 

“I’m tired, I’ve had too much to drink, and the bed in that spare bedroom looks far more comfortable than my bunk at the mountain.”

 

“Well I’m not staying.  I can take one of those taxicabs back.”

 

This time it’s Cam and Daniel’s turn.  “No!”

 

Daniel elaborates.  “Vala, I’m not letting you loose on an unsuspecting public at . . .”  Daniel glances at his watch.  “Eleven at night?  God.  I must be getting old.”

 

“You’ve been hitting the books pretty hard, Jackson.  You deserve to be tired.  Bed’s all yours if you really want it.”

 

“Thank you,” he sighs, getting to his feet.  He’s only a few feet from the couch when he pauses and looks back.  He raises his eyebrows expectantly.  “Well?  Are you coming?”

 

Any question that Cam has about their relationship is answered in the sudden and quickly concealed surprise that crosses Vala’s face.  “I’ll be right there,” she says.

 

“Actually, I was talking to Colonel Mitchell.”

 

For just one second Cam thinks that his heart hasn’t beat this fast since Antarctica, and then Daniel cracks up.

 

“Your faces,” he snickers, ambling down the hallway.  A second later he calls “Vala!” and she scrambles up off the couch.

 

“Coming darling!”

 

Cam grabs her wrist as she goes by.  “In a minute,” he calls down the hallway.  Quieter, he says to Vala, “He’s right, you know.  We do need to talk.”

 

“I think you’ve said quite enough.”  But she doesn’t pull out of his grasp.

 

Well, he knew she was angry, but the thought that he might have actually hurt her feelings, well, that hasn’t even crossed his mind.  Vala isn’t supposed to have feelings, and the realization that she just might, throws him off.

 

“Vala, whatever impression you got back on the plane, I only meant that . . .”

 

“That what?” she prompts without rebuke.

 

“That you drive me crazy,” he admits.

 

Vala smiles, slow and confident, and steps further into his personal space.  She reminds him of a shark in moments like these, and he wonders if he should have been more specific, because ‘you drive me crazy’ could be taken a lot of ways, but then, didn’t he mean it in a lot of ways?

 

“I know I drive you crazy.  I drive everyone crazy.  Between the Ori and being burned alive and Adria and being stuck in that damn mountain, watching all of you splutter and turn red is the only amusement I can afford.”

 

 “So that’s what this last week has been about?  Amusement?  Watching me squirm?”

 

“Well I was quite upset.  At first.  Okay, until lunch the next day.  But you squirmed so nicely I couldn’t help myself.”

 

He has the inexplicable feeling that she’s about to grab his ass, but she just smiles up at him and he finds himself grinning back down at her.  “So we’re good?”  He still hasn’t let go of her wrist.

 

“I suppose.  In the morning you can tell Daniel that we talked.  I’m sure he’ll be pleased.”  A slight frown forms on her mouth.  “That’s one thing I don’t think I’ll ever understand about you earthlings.  Mouths can do such delightful things, and all you bunch ever seem to use them for is talking.”  She shakes her head but her eyes are twinkling.  “Such a waste.”  Vala presses up against his entire body and he lets go of her wrist to push her away, but his hands just sort of . . . hover . . . over her hips.

 

“Goodnight Colonel Mitchell,” she breathes, tiptoeing up to place a lingering kiss on his cheek, just close enough to the corner of his mouth to be considered a tease.  There’s no way she can miss the swell of his burgeoning erection, especially when it twitches the longer her hips are in contact with his.

 

Just when he thinks he’s going to actually touch her, turn his head for the kiss she seems to be offering, Vala steps back and winks at him.  And heads for the room—the bed—where Daniel is apparently waiting for her.

 

The bedroom door clicks shut and his head drops to his chest as he lets go of the breath he didn’t realize he was holding.  His eyes fall on the bulge in his jeans.

 

“Hey buddy.  Looks like we’re not done squirming yet.”


	5. On Enjoyment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves."   
> Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889-1951)

Cam guards the main door as Daniel stands near the entrance to the inner chamber.

 

“Funny, I don’t remember you telling us about the *other* worlds that Quetesh ruled over,” Daniel calls through the door.

 

“That’s because I didn’t, Daniel.  A girl’s got to have some secrets,” Vala calls back.

 

“Not these kinds of secrets.”

 

“Oh, but it’s okay to know what color my underwear are?”

 

Cam raises his eyebrows at the bickering that has been noticeably absent until their arrival on PX7-95R and watches as Daniel rolls his eyes and throws his hands in the air.

 

“Look,” Cam interrupts.  “All I want to know is why we’re playing along with this charade.  I thought we were on the side that came out against false gods.”

 

“We are, but as much as I hate to admit it, Vala has a valid point.”

 

“Which is?”

 

“The Ori are on their way.  We need to convince these people that just because someone displays powers they don’t understand it doesn’t make them a god.  Vala, or rather, Quetesh, is in a unique position to show them that.”

 

“Didn’t work so well last time, as I recall.”

 

“No, it didn’t,” says Vala, stepping out of the inner room.  If they thought her last goa’uld outfit was interesting, well, this one topped that by a mile.  “That’s why Daniel has agreed to bow to my wisdom and experience in these matters.”

 

“And did he bow before or after you put on that . . . dress?” Cam smirks.

 

“You forgot ‘during’,” she smiles.

 

“As I was saying,” Daniel continues, ignoring them.  “Vala will be able to get them to listen while she shows them she’s not a god, just a regular human with some advanced technology.”

 

“Regular, Daniel?  I’m wounded.”

 

“And hopefully when the Ori arrive, these people will see them for what they really are.”

 

“Bad guys on a power trip,” crows Cameron.

 

“Well . . . yes, I suppose.”  Daniel frowns and wanders over to Quetesh’s altar.

 

“What’s up with him?” Cam murmurs when Vala sidles up to him.

 

“Oh, I don’t know.  I think maybe he used up his year’s supply of ‘nice’ during our little movie night.”

 

He tries to keep his attention firmly on their surroundings, but his body remembers the tactile sensation of that lithe—and now partially undressed—body pressed against his.  It’s hard to keep his eyes above Vala’s neck.

 

“You two have a fight or something?”

 

“Not that I’m aware of.  When he woke up he was back to his usually cranky self.”

 

“Be nice, Vala.”

 

“Being nice never got me anything.  Well, unless I was just pretending to be nice, and that usually got me quite a lot—“

 

“Vala,” Daniel calls, motioning Vala over.  “This painting—the figure is wearing a dress very similar to what you’re wearing now.”

 

Cameron’s relieved that Vala is moving away until his eyes fall on the back of her outfit.  Or rather, the lack of the back of her outfit.  Christ, he can even see the dimples just above her—

 

“Yes, that’s a representation of the Truth Ceremony.  This is my ceremonial dress.”  She does a twirl and it can only be some form of Goa’uld technology that keeps the dress in place.

 

“Ceremonial?  That makes sense, as it certainly isn’t functional.”

 

“What are you talking about?  It’s perfectly functional.”

 

“Functional,” Cam butts in, “implies that it leaves a little, or in your case, a lot more to the imagination.”

 

“Colonel, your imagination doesn’t even being to cover what this dress does,” Vala purrs.

 

He rolls his eyes and looks to Daniel, fully expecting the other man to be laughing at his expense, but instead Daniel’s frown deepens and he goes back to the paintings on the altar.  Huh.

 

“I’m sure the answer to this is going to be no, but I don’t suppose the nudity of everyone else in the painting is just a metaphor for truth, openness, nothing to hide.”

 

“I’m afraid not, darling.”

 

“Wait, you’re saying we have to get naked for this?”  Cameron doesn’t have a problem with nudity, per se, but with nudity involving his teammates and large groups of strangers.  He doesn’t even try it as an argument though, because Vala would say that she’s already seen him naked, and that he and Daniel see each other naked whenever they happen to be in the showers at the same time.  Still, it’s not exactly something that he wants to have to put in a mission report.

 

Vala eyes both of them speculatively for a moment, letting them sweat.  “Unfortunately, no.  Quetesh liked seeing some of these people naked about as much as I did, so she quickly changed the ceremony from ‘nude’ to ‘scantily clad’.  For you two I’d be willing to make an exception, though.”

 

“Thanks, I think we’ll pass,” Cam tells her.

 

“Come now, neither of you has anything to be ashamed of.  Well, Daniel has this little—“

 

“Vala,” Daniel says harshly.  The warning in his voice is clear:  Don’t make me get my boonie.

 

“Right, shutting up now!” she says brightly, but even Cam can tell she’s faking it.  Hell.  Now he’s going to have to have the Dr. Phil talk with Jackson.  And also see if he can learn that tone of voice that silences Vala so quickly.


	6. On Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sex -- the great inequality, the great miscalculator, the great Irritator.  
> Enid Bagnold
> 
> If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.  
> Rodney Dangerfield

He *is* going to talk to Daniel, he promises himself.  After they get back.  Well, when they get back he has some reports to finish, so after that.  Unless it’s late, and then he’ll do it tomorrow.  Except tomorrow they’re due to go offworld at oh-nine-hundred, so there probably won’t be time before the mission, and after there will be debriefing and more reports and possible trips to the infirmary and—

 

“Colonel Mitchell, are you listening to me?”

 

His attention snaps back to the woman at his side, or rather, the woman who was at his side.  Cam glances back and sees her standing in the middle of the sidewalk, arms crossed, frown line between her eyebrows.  She’s obviously been spending too much time with Daniel.

 

“Sure . . . wasn’t,” he finishes, knowing that it’s better to fess up now than to get caught in a lie later.  “Sorry,” he adds, hoping to stave off the inevitable lecture.  “And I told you, when I’m off duty, you can call me Cameron.”

 

“Teal’c doesn’t.”

 

“Well, Teal’c is . . . Teal’c.”

 

She narrows her eyes at his lame-ass explanation, and so he gives her the look, the one that says I’m just a good ol’ southern boy who enjoys grits and football and your daughter is lovely ma’am and of course I love puppies and stick with me cause I’m gonna save the world.  He can see her start to waver.  “Please, Vala.  I’d really rather you just called me Cameron.”

 

She sighs and drops her arms.  “Fine.  *Cameron*.”  It sounds strange coming from her mouth.  She calls almost everyone else by their first names – Teal’c, Sam.  Daniel sounds like a dirty word when she says it, but with him it’s always Colonel this and Mitchell that.  “And don’t think that I didn’t notice your oh so subtle change of topic.  I’ll have you know that I was baring my soul and you were completely oblivious.”

 

“Vala,” he starts without thinking.  “Of all the things you bare I doubt your soul even makes it into the top twenty.”

 

Her eyes grow round and he thinks ‘oh shit, I’ve done it again’ until she smirks and saunters toward him.  “So you *have* been paying attention.”  Her hand runs up his chest and she drums her fingers against his collar.  “I was beginning to wonder.”

 

He’s beginning to wonder what the hell he was thinking, getting Vala off the base with a day pass, just the two of them despite the looks from Sam and General Landry and the non-look from Teal’c.  Well, they want him to stop the constant bickering between Daniel and Vala, and this is the first thing he could think of.  He certainly isn’t going to take Jackson out for dinner and a movie.

 

He’s beginning to wonder why he thought taking Vala was the better idea.  Her hair tickles his bare arm and the smell of apples wafts into his nose.  He stares down at her, playing the stoic, keeping one hand tucked safely in his pocket and the other firmly at his side, pretending that she doesn’t kick him into high gear, pretending that he doesn’t know that *she* knows it too.

 

She backs away slowly—no wink this time—and then turns to continue down the sidewalk.  When she says his name this time, there’s no awkwardness, it flows from her tongue like she’s been ordering him around his entire life.

 

“Come Cameron.  I’ve just stolen your car keys and unless you can get them back, I get to drive.”

 

His hands fly to his pockets.  He finds his wallet, some change, but no keys.  Vala is half a block ahead of him and grinning like a maniac.  His body reacts before his brain, and he’s running after her before he’s even had time to fully formulate a plan of action.  Vala’s long legs easily keep her in the lead until they come to a major intersection and a red light, and she hesitates just long enough for him to *almost* catch her.

 

People on the sidewalk scatter around them, and it’s entirely possible that someone is already phoning the police because there is a woman being chased through the streets by a man with an intense look on his face, and he worries a little about getting in trouble until he sees Vala glance over her shoulder, hears her laughter drifting back to him, smells the challenge in the air.

 

Sweet lord in heaven, but he’s having fun.

 

Vala takes a sharp turn into an alley.  He can’t remember the last time he ran this hard without bullets or arrows or energy blasts whizzing past his ear.

 

Cam skids to a halt in the mouth of the alley, spots the dead end, looks up in time to see Vala’s feet disappearing over the top of the ladder.  He swings himself up and follows.  It’s silent on the low roof—another metal rung ladder leads up to the next level but he pauses.  It’s too easy, and there are too many shadows to hide in here.  He even imagines he can smell apples.

 

A faint noise draws his attention to the right and he realizes his mistake even before gravel crunches and a blur of motion explodes to his left.  He catches her, but only because Vala’s high heeled boots don’t provide much traction and she slips on the gravel before she can make it past him.  He has his arms wrapped around her from behind, pinning her arms across her chest.  She puts up a halfhearted struggle that ends when he growls, “Keys?”

 

“I told you,” she pants.  “You’re going to have to.  Get them.”

 

He hesitates with his hand on her hip, sliding towards her pocket.  He has a pretty good idea where this is going, and now that he’s here, he’s not so sure he wants to go.  Cam buries his nose in Vala’s hair for just a second, memorizing the smell of her and the curve of her ass against his groin, and then says, “What about Daniel?”

 

Vala stills, and there is a forced casualness in her voice when she replies, “What about him?”

 

“Vala,” he warns.

 

She jerks away but he’s prepared for it and she stays trapped within the confines of his arms.

 

“There’s nothing I’d like more than—“  She shifts her hips and his breath catches.  “—to let this play out,” he finishes hoarsely.  “But every time I’m around you, I can’t help but feel like I’m trespassing on someone else’s property.”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Yes you do.  But the question is whether or not you care.”

 

“I care about Daniel,” she says simply.

 

Which is one of the answers he is looking for, though not exactly the one he wants at this particular moment.  Summoning every ounce of decency he starts to pull away.  Vala’s arm snakes out and her fingers wrap around his wrist.

 

“I care about you as well.”

 

He can only see her in profile, but the look she’s giving him is dead serious.  He wants to believe she’s being sincere.  Still—

 

“Are you just saying that because you want me to kiss you?”

 

Her expression doesn’t waver.  “Do you care?”

 

And in the split second it takes him to realize that the look on her face is actually want and heat and something more, and that he didn’t recognize it right away because this is the first time it’s been directed at him and not Jackson, he’s pulling her against his body and bending his head to taste her mouth.

 

Vala opens to him without hesitation and lets out a soft sigh as his tongue slides along hers.  He gives in and glides his hand up her back and into her hair, pulling, not hard, but just hard enough to see what kind of reaction he’ll get.  Vala doesn’t disappoint.  She groans and arches her back, pressing even closer to him.

 

His fist tightens, just so he can swallow her groan again.

 

Cool fingers work their way under the edge of his t-shirt, short nails digging into his skin.  One of Vala’s hands changes course and moves down, teasing along the waist of his jeans.  He sucks in a breath when her hand slips under, and all he can think is ‘Vala has her hand on my ass’.  And then whoa, her hand slides to the front and she’s playing with the button on his jeans.  His cock strains painfully against the denim.

 

He breaks away so that he can say, “I stopped thinking that vertical sex was sexy about the same time that I actually started having sex.”

 

Vala’s intense expression turns into a wicked grin.  “My dear Cameron.  Let me show you what you’ve been missing.”  And she starts to sink to her knees in the gravel, nuzzling his stomach on the way down.

 

Sweet baby Jesus, that’s not what he means.  He just means that they should move this somewhere horizontal, with a bed, or at least a couch—hell, he’d settle for a blanket on the ground right about now—but he should have known that Vala will take him literally and . . .

 

“Vala,” he hisses, partly because they’re in public, and partly because he can hardly speak.  Her breath is hot on his crotch.  She’s kneeling there, an inch away, just *breathing* on him.  It takes his one remaining shred of decency not to thrust his hips forward.

 

Her hands skim up his legs to his hips, and then she leans in that last precious inch and runs the tip of her nose over the hard outline of his cock.  Cam grunts and locks his knees.  He’s just about to give in and bury his fingers in her hair when there’s a loud yell from above them.

 

“Hey, get a fucking room or I’m calling the cops!”

 

Cam scrambles back, pulling Vala with him and scanning the surrounding buildings.  There’s a dark silhouette in one of the lighted windows.

 

Vala takes a playful nip at his jawline.  “Ignore them.”

 

“I’m calling the cops!” the voice yells again.

 

“We can’t,” he whispers to Vala.  “Come on.  I don’t think General Landry would be too happy if we got arrested for public indecency.”  He starts to pull her toward the ladder.

 

“This is what your law defines as indecent?  I hate to break it to you, but as a culture you earthlings are suffering from a lack of imagination.”


	7. On Patience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He that can have patience can have what he will.   
> Benjamin Franklin

Cameron tries valiantly *not* to bang his head on the briefing room table.  He tries to be attentive, and understanding, and commanding.  He tries to nod whenever anyone speaks directly to him.  He tries not to think about Vala crawling under the table and unzipping his fly—

 

He catches Sam looking at his hands and then up at him with concern.  He’s gripping the edge of the table so hard his knuckles are white, and he wants to let go but he’s afraid it’s the only thing that’s keeping him from bouncing off the walls at the moment.  He focuses his attention back on General Landry.

 

“Do we have any idea what he really wants?”

 

Jackson answers.  “No.  He says that he’ll only speak to Vala.  And Vala refuses to see him.”

 

“Did she say why?” Cam asks.  He’s paying attention now.

 

Daniel gives him a look he can’t interpret.  “No.  She won’t tell me why.  Maybe you would have better luck.”

 

“Jackson, Vala hardly listens to me at the best of times—“

 

“Actually, she’s been listening to you a lot lately.  You seem to have developed quite the rapport.”

 

Cam can’t quite decide if he should play dumb or if he should ask Daniel what the hell his problem is.  There’s tension in the room and he’s aware of the General and the rest of SG-1 staring at him curiously.  He opens his mouth to attempt to tread somewhere in the middle, but General Landry cuts him off.

 

“Colonel Mitchell, talk to Vala.  Impress upon her the concept of co-operation.”

 

“Yes sir.”

 

“Teal’c, continue to question our guest.  Maybe there’s something else we can offer that will get him to talk.”  Teal’c inclines his head.

 

“Dismissed.”

 

Daniel is first out of the briefing room, and with a reluctant glance at his teammates, Cam hurries after.

 

“Jackson!” he calls in the hallway.

 

Daniel hesitates, then stops and turns to face him.  He raises his eyebrows expectantly.

 

Cam knows he should probably handle this carefully, but what comes out of his mouth instead is, “Jackson, do we have a problem?”

 

“Oh, no.  No problem.  The fate of the galaxy rests in our hands.  Again.  But if you want to go and take our only source of information out on a date, then as the leader of SG-1 I suppose that’s your prerogative.  I’m sure the galaxy will be fine.”

 

Cam gapes.  He doesn’t even know where to begin with that statement.  Like he’s already told General Landry, he doesn’t really think he leads anything around here, but Daniel is getting his hackles up and so he’s not about to admit it.

 

“It wasn’t a date.  It was a reprieve.  The two of you in the same space was driving the rest of us crazy.  Whatever is going on between you and Vala, it has got to get straightened out now.”

 

“Between *me* and Vala?  Riiiiight,” Daniel says, giving him that unreadable look again.

 

He wonders if Daniel knows.  He and Vala had sped back to his apartment, only to find the answering machine full of messages about why he wasn’t answering his cell and to get his ass—and Vala’s—back to the mountain asap.  They were perfectly put together when they stepped back on the base, and Daniel was the first to find them, dragging Vala away with a stern “Come now” and completely ignoring Cam.

 

No, he can’t know from just that.  And why is Cam feeling so damn guilty all of a sudden?

 

“Look.  I’m going to go talk to Vala.  We’re going to get all this straightened out.  And then you and I are going to have a little chat.”

 

Daniel looks like he wants to protest, but simply rolls his eyes and utters a put upon “Fine.”  Cam watches him disappear around the corner before making a frustrated face and heading toward Vala’s room.

 

She doesn’t answer the first four knocks, so Cam turns the unlocked knob and sticks his head in.

 

“Vala?”

 

“Colonel.”

 

It throws him for a moment, hearing her say his rank, especially when not more than four hours ago she was whispering “Cameron” in his ear as her hand worked open the button of his jeans and he tried not to steer them right off the road.  He furiously blocks that vision from his mind so that he can get back to the task at hand.

 

“Hear you’ve got a visitor.”

 

“Yes.  And if Daniel has sent you down here to get me to talk to him, the answer is still no.”

 

“Actually, I was wondering if you wanted dessert.”  She gives him a look eerily similar to the one Jackson’s been giving him all night.  “There’s extra red jello in the commissary,” he feels the need to explain.  She doesn’t even make an innuendo about ‘dessert’.  That’s when he knows something is wrong.

 

“I suppose there’s always room for jello,” Vala sighs, crawling off the bed.  Cam isn’t sure if her words are just a coincidence, or if she’s making a joke.  Her face is a mystery.

 

Their walk to the commissary is mostly silent.  Cam stops himself no less than seven times from casually touching her arm, guiding her with a hand on her back.  She doesn’t appear to have the same problem.  In fact, she’s acting like nothing at all has happened between them.  Not that he wants her to jump up and give him a lap dance in the briefing room or anything, but it would be nice to have an acknowledgement of what they’d shared, that she’d . . . that she’d enjoyed it.  He stops her in the doorway.

 

“Vala.”  She tenses.  Cam lowers his voice.  “The last time I saw you, you seemed fine.  More than fine,” he whispers, lacing the words with some innuendo of his own.  “So whatever’s bothering you has to do with that Varek guy.”

 

“I knew that’s why you came to see me,” she accuses lightly, crossing her arms.  “You want me to talk to him and you were going to bribe me with jello.”

 

“Would it have worked?”

 

“Not this time.”

 

“What about chocolate?”

 

She narrows her eyes.

 

“Fine, fine.  I get it.  You don’t want to talk to him.  Can I ask—“

 

“No.  Daniel tried that too.  Repeatedly.  Insistently.”

 

“I don’t think you understand the situation.  This man says that he has valuable information about the Ori.  Which he will only reveal to you.  If there’s even a remote chance that we can learn something to beat these bastards—“

 

“He’s lying.”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“Because I know him.  He lies.  That’s what he does.”

 

He tactfully fails to point out that that’s how many people would have described her just a few months ago.  Hell, *he* probably would have described her that way.

 

“This is important.”

 

“Yes, it is,” she says stubbornly.

 

“So what?  You conned him and now he’s out for revenge?  A jilted lover?”

 

Something dangerous flashes in her eyes.  He ignores it, ignores the pang of regret in his stomach.  This *is* important.  It’s also an order.

 

“Are you going to tell me, or am I gonna have to keep guessing?”

 

“Fine,” she spits, and he’s a little surprised that she’s given in already.  “I’ll wring his meaty neck for every drop of information I can.  On one condition.”

 

“And that is?”

 

“I do it in private.  Security cameras off, recording devices off, no guards.”

 

“Not a chance.”

 

“Then I’m not going anywhere near him.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because some of my business is none of yours.”

 

Frustrated, Cam leans in and backs Vala again the doorframe.  “When you agreed to stay here, all of your business became mine.  Vala, we’re trying to save Earth, and a hundred other planets and possibly the whole galaxy.  What is so important that you can’t spend ten minutes with one guy?”

 

Her lips tighten into a thin white line.  “Cameras on, but no sound, and no guards.”

 

“Cameras on, no sound, two guards.”

 

“Down the hall.”

 

“Inside the room.”

 

“One guard outside.”

 

“One guard inside.”

 

She tilts her head and looks up at him.  “One guard outside, and I’ll let you kiss me again.”

 

He puts one hand on the doorframe beside her head.  “You know, I think I’m starting to catch on.”

 

“To what?”

 

“To when you’re actually flirting and when you’re just trying to get your way.”

 

“I didn’t realize there was a difference,” she says, and oh-so-slightly shifts so that the outside of her thigh brushes the inside of his.

 

“Vala,” he says softly.  “Please tell me what’s going on.”

 

She pauses, swallows, looks away.  “Please don’t make me.”

 

“I wish I had a choice.”

 

The weariness in her eyes almost makes him take back his words.  Until he pictures the General’s face at hearing that Cam has disobeyed an order and possibly brought about the downfall of the galaxy.

 

“Vala—“

 

“Yes, yes I know.  If I do this for you, you’ll shower me with chocolate and expensive gifts for the rest of our Ori-free lives.  Possibly I’ll have a street named after me.”

 

Cam thinks about responding in kind, but Vala’s grin is only half-hearted.  “Thank you,” he says instead.

 

Vala pushes away from the wall and Cam steps back to let her go.  “You’re welcome.  I’ll expect my first gift tomorrow morning.  The shinier the better,” she adds as she disappears down the corridor.


	8. On Uncertainty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In these matters the only certainty is that nothing is certain.   
> Pliny the Elder (23 AD - 79 AD)

In his mind’s eye, Cam watches it play out like a train wreck.  He sends an SF after Vala to guard the door with orders not to let anyone else in.  He goes to find Daniel, but gets sidetracked by the General.  When he gets out of General Landry’s office he sees the monitor from the interrogation room, the tiny black and white Vala with her arms wrapped tightly around herself, Daniel trying to crush the windpipe of Varek, and the SF with a zat pointed steadily at Daniel’s head.

 

By the time he gets there, Varek is already being dragged to the infirmary and Cam can tell with every electric twitch that any chance of getting the guy to talk has been blown all to hell.  He resists the urge to steal the weapon and zat everyone in the room.  Daniel is trying to talk to Vala but she shoves him away with an icy “Don’t touch me,” and hurries out the door.  Daniel starts to follow her, but Cam gives the SF a look.

 

Daniel is glaring at the SF blocking the doorway, but his words are clearly meant for Cam.  “Let me go.”

 

“Not without the magic word, Jackson.”

 

“Or else?” he tries with gritted teeth.

 

“Nope.  Wanna try again?”

 

Cam can see the angry set of Daniel’s jaw and the way his hand curls tightly into a fist at his side.  He’s both relieved and disappointed when Daniel relaxes his shoulders slightly and steps away from the SF.  Cam smiles, fake, and Daniel returns it.

 

“Sir?” asks the SF.

 

“Airman, if I ask you to stand outside and make sure no one comes in, are you going to let people waltz in?”

 

“No sir.”

 

Cam gives him a hard stare and he flushes.

 

“Not this time sir.”

 

Cam nods and the door closes and Daniel is standing very, very still.  “I suppose this is that little chat you wanted to have.”

 

Cam shrugs out of his jacket with more patience than he’s feeling right now.  The blue fabric lands stiffly over the back of the chair.  “I suppose it is.”

 

There is a long pause where Cam tries to work out what he’s feeling at this exact moment.  Most of it, unfortunately, is overwhelmed by urge to plant his foot in Jackson’s ass.  “Let’s start with what just happened here,” he says, straddling the chair that Varek had been sitting in.

 

“I saw that Vala was in here by herself and she looked upset.  When I came in, Varek was saying that—well, it doesn’t matter what he said.  The point is, she shouldn’t have been in here alone with him.”

 

“She asked to be alone with him.”

 

“And you just said yes.”

 

“Eventually, yes.  It was the only way she would agree to speak with him.”

 

Daniel’s lips tighten into a thin white line.

 

“So Varek said something nasty and you thought it would help by choking him to death?”

 

“If you’d heard what he said—“

 

“But I didn’t.  And that was the whole point of Vala being in here alone.  *She* didn’t want anyone to hear either.”  That much he’s been able to figure out on his own, but he tamps down on his curiosity.  Right now this isn’t about Vala – it’s about Daniel.

 

“Jackson, I’m no shrink.  I’m just a flyboy trying to fill someone else’s shoes—“ and oops, that isn’t supposed to come out.  He hopes that if he just keeps going Daniel won’t notice.  “But if something is wrong, I’d really like to help.  I don’t think the Dr. Phil stuff is going to work for us, so why don’t we settle this like men.  You and me, one on one.”

 

“You want to fight?”  Daniel asks incredulously.

 

Cam rolls his eyes.  “I want to play basketball, Jackson.  Go get changed and I’ll meet you in the gym in ten.  That’s an order.”

 

He gets up and strides out before Daniel can object.  He’s to his locker and changed in three minutes flat, even with the brief pause in the hallway near Vala’s quarters.  Two more to tie the laces on his sneakers and grab a basketball.  He’s making shots for ten minutes by himself, trying to hold his temper in check, when the door slowly squeaks open.

 

“Sorry I’m late,” Jackson says, not quite sounding it.

 

Cam fires the ball at him hard enough to make Daniel flinch.  “Your ball.”

 

Maybe Cam’s a little more aggressive than usual, but in the beginning they’re fairly even, dancing around each other like a regular game.  Later, when Cam’s showered and cooled down and back in his quarters, he’ll stop and think about the exact moment that changed.  He’ll think it has something to do with this: Jackson has the ball and Cam is right up in his face.  Jackson half-turns, tries to cut around him and they bump into each other.  Cam stumbles back a step and then Jackson charges, his big shoulder hitting Cam square in the chest and sending him sprawling on his ass while Jackson goes in for the lay up.

 

“I’m fine,” is on the tip of his tongue, but Jackson doesn’t ask, just stares at him until he gets to his feet.  Cam tries not to rub his sternum.  Tries not to flinch when Jackson fires the ball back.

 

After that it degenerates into grunts and sweat and bruised ribs and when Daniel trips him up he grabs a fistful of Daniel’s shirt because he sure as hell isn’t going down alone.  They land hard on the floor and all the air rushes from Cam’s lungs as Daniel lands heavily on top him and proceeds not to move an inch.

 

He pushes to get up but Daniel surprises him, locks his body and becomes immovable.  He tests it, and Daniel leans a forearm across his chest.  Hard.  Sometimes he forgets that Daniel’s not just an archaeologist any more.

 

“I thought you wanted to play basketball,” Daniel grits out.

 

Cam tries not to wheeze or sound like he’s being slowly crushed.  “Sure.  We’ve got ourselves a ball, a basket—“

 

“Don’t give me that southern down home crap.  What do you want?”

 

Cam frowns.  This was supposed to be about Jackson, about getting him mad enough to blurt out whatever was wrong, or at the very least about getting him to blow off some steam.  And Jackson wants to know what *he* wants?

 

“I want a lot of things.  Breathing being right at the top of that list—“

 

Daniel lifts his arm and Cam thinks he’s going to get up but instead of shifting upwards, Daniel just . . . shifts and whoa, that’s a finely muscled thigh between his legs, easing forward with an almost imperceptible pressure.  His eyes fly to Daniel’s.

 

“Jackson?”

 

Daniel stares down at him, lips tight, pupils even more blown than usual.  “Mitchell.  What do you want?”

 

Screw this.  He’ll just recommend that Daniel get a short vacation and a trip to the shrink.  “I want you to *get off*,” he says lowly, all joking gone.

 

Daniel cocks his head to one side.  Cam can feel the thigh wedged between his flexing.  “Really.”

 

“Jesus Chr—“ Cam starts, lifting his shoulders off the floor.  This time, Daniel doesn’t casually lean down on him.  This time Daniel shoves him back to the floor.  Pain lances up from the back of his head and for a moment he sees stars.  He reins in a powerful surge of anger and settles for glaring up at Jackson.  Everything he wants to say right now would make him look juvenile and everything he wants to do would land Jackson in the infirmary.

 

“What.  Do.  You.  Want?”  Daniel asks for the third time.

 

Cam grits his teeth.  “I.  Want.  You—“ to get the hell off me, he finishes, but only in his mind because Daniel’s mouth comes crashing down violently on his.  Daniel’s mouth.  His fucking *mouth*.

 

There’s no finesse.  It’s lips and teeth and the force behind it is more angry than anything else, which in Cam’s not entirely inconsiderable experience is not the usual reason for kissing someone and when he realizes that he’s laying there *analyzing* he feels sort of horrified.  All that training and all it takes is one little kiss to freeze him in his tracks.  Okay, one big kiss, and it’s from a man, which wouldn’t be such a big deal because Cam’s no homophobe, but hello, heterosexual and—fuck, he’s still analyzing.

 

Cam shoves as hard as he can and manages to roll them so he’s on top.  He ignores the relief in his gut when he realizes that Jackson isn’t hard, because admitting that will mean he also has to admit that he is aware of  the way their groins are mashing together in the roll.  Daniel stares up at him, panting, nostrils flaring, bracing himself like he’s about to get punched.  Cam stares down at his hands where they’re twisted in the damp collar of Daniel’s shirt.  Hitting Daniel hasn’t even crossed his mind in the last thirty seconds, and he’s not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

 

He pushes himself to his feet and steps back.  He considers holding his hand out, but Jackson is already getting to his feet and eyeing him cautiously.  Cam checks again, and nope, the urge to clock Daniel has not returned.  His hands aren’t even making fists.

 

Cam opens his mouth but isn’t sure what to say.  ‘I’m not going to hit you’ seems like it should be at the top of the list, followed closely by ‘what the hell was that?’ and then ‘what the *hell* was *that*?’

 

He tries again, complete with hand gesture before letting out a sigh of defeat.  He raises his eyebrows at Jackson, who is now frowning at him with that odd ‘let’s decipher the actions of this alien race’ expression.

 

Cam turns and leaves the gym.  If this is what General O’Neill was putting up with for eight years, the man deserves stars all the way down his fucking arms.


	9. On Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent.  
> Bob Dylan

For the first time in, well, ever, Cam is just a little bit sorry that there is no pressing Ori-related crisis of the week.  Because going off-world would at least give him a valid reason to talk to his teammates, even if it was just about the weather.

 

Vala is avoiding him, spending all her free time with Teal’c doing, well, he isn’t sure exactly.  Jaffa-type things.  He can’t picture Vala sitting still long enough to kel no reem, but whatever it is, it’s keeping her busy.

 

Daniel is sequestered in his office with even larger piles of books than usual, flying from the page to the keyboard to his journal and on and on it goes.  Cam walks in one afternoon, gets about five seconds of the look Daniel aims at him, and leaves without a word.

 

He visits Sam in her lab a few times, but he can only pretend to understand what she’s talking about for so long.  He works out, but avoids the gym, and spends too much time on the firing range.  His last refuge in his barely used office.  Sometimes when he steps over the threshold he gets the feeling he should be saluting someone sitting behind the desk, before he reminds himself that *he’s* the one sitting behind the desk.

 

On the third morning there’s a soft knock at the door.  Vala is standing there regarding him curiously.  He stops himself from jumping up and hugging her and dragging her in to the office to sit with him.  Barely.

 

“Vala,” he says instead.

 

“You’ve been leaving me presents,” she says casually, but he can hear the question in her voice.  That’s when he notices she’s holding a small white box—the same box he’d left outside her door early that morning.

 

“Thought that was part of the deal.”

 

“And you always do as you’re told, don’t you?”  They both know that’s not true and she’s practically daring him to say something about their little rooftop encounter.  Familiar heat pools in his gut at the thought of it.

 

Vala slowly steps up to his desk and lays the box on the edge.  “You don’t have to, you know.”

 

For a moment he thinks that she’s telling him he doesn’t have to do as he’s told until he realizes that she means the gift.

 

“Are you giving it back?” he asks, trying not to sound insulted.  “Because I can’t return it and I certainly can’t wear it.”

 

She smiles then, just a little, and he’s happy to see that it’s sincere.  “I’m sure it would bring out the blue of your eyes.”

 

“That’s—“  Exactly what I thought about you when I bought it.  “Nice.  But I’m sure there’s a regulation somewhere about wearing hair accessories during combat.”

 

“Well, distraction is the key to winning any battle.”

 

And that makes him think of slender fingers and car keys.  Cam shifts in his chair, suddenly uncomfortable.  Vala begins to leave so he blurts, “Wait.  Vala . . .”

 

She pauses in the doorway.

 

“I’m sorry.  About, well, about you having to see Varek.  I don’t know what happened between the two of you, but I know it must have been difficult.  And I’m sorry about Daniel—he was just—“

 

“Being Daniel,” she finishes for him.

 

Cam nods.  “He only wanted to help.”

 

Vala sighs and studies him for a moment.  She shuts the door to his office and pulls a chair around to his side of the desk.  “The planet where I grew up was very rural, very poor.  My family was poorer than most.  Our area was ruled over by a powerful family who had a son the same age as I was.  That was Varek.  When his father died and he became Lord he required a wife to provide him with heirs.”

 

“You don’t—“

 

Vala holds her fingers up to his lips.  “Please.  Just let me.”

 

When Cam nods for her to continue, her fingers linger, passing over his cheek.

 

“Naturally, I was the most charming and beautiful, and so my father thought this great gift would compel Varek to loosen his purse strings and help my family.  On our wedding night I made this request of him, and he beat me for my insolence.”

 

Vala glances up quickly to gauge his reaction.  He slips his hand around hers and tugs her closer.  She squeezes and takes a breath.

 

“To further complicate matters, I was unable to provide him with the heir he wanted.  After that, well, lets just say that our wedding night became a fond memory.  We were married for two years when the Goa’uld came.  We had no previous knowledge of the Goa’uld—I could only see it as a way to escape Varek.  I saw other women boarding one of the ships.  I thought I was saved.”

 

“But it was Quetesh,” Cam says with dawning horror.  She’d escaped an abusive husband only to become host to a Goa’uld.

 

“Yes.  I suppose I should consider myself lucky.  Quetesh was very vain.  She had all of the other women executed immediately.”

 

“You sure have a strange definition of lucky.  If the choice were between death and being a host…”

 

“If I’d been killed back then I wouldn’t be here now, with you.”

 

“Well in that case, I guess I’m the lucky one.”

 

She gives him that small smile again and his heart flops.  God, he’s so screwed.  He reaches for the box and digs the barrette out of it’s cotton ball bed.  He presses it into her palm.

 

“Keep it.”

 

He can tell she wants to, by the way her eyes light up when the surface of the barrette catches the light.  “But . . . I didn’t get any information out of Varek.”

 

“But you tried.  You put yourself through that for us.  God, Vala, you’ve been through so much for us.  If shiny things are what makes you happy, then who am I to stand in the way of that?”

 

“Careful Colonel.  A girl might start to think you actually like her.”

 

Cam gives her his own small smile.  “A girl might.”


	10. On Reactions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.   
> Carl Jung (1875 - 1961)

Cam stares up at the ceiling of his tent.  Well, it’s pitch black, so he can’t really *see* the ceiling but he knows it’s up there somewhere.  Normally when they’re odd-numbered off-world they draw straws for who gets a tent all to themselves.  He doesn’t even get a chance to get some sticks together before Daniel and Vala are setting theirs up and Teal’c is gesturing Sam into the second tent.  Guess he’s the lucky one, then.

 

He sighs.  He can’t relax because it’s too damn quiet.  Hell, he’d even put up with Sam’s snoring if it would lull him into sleep.  And it’s not just that he’s alone – there are no outside sounds.  No birds, no insects.  Sam says it has something to do with the energy field, that it has repelled all of the wildlife.  Completely logical.  He thinks it’s completely unnatural.

 

He strains his ears to hear Teal’c, who’s keeping watch, but it’s totally silent except for his own breathing.  Teal’c could be doing some sort of Jaffa tribal dance out there and they’d never hear him.  A few minutes later there’s the sound of a zipper and some low conversation – Daniel taking over the watch.

 

Cam waits for what feels like five hours but is actually less than five minutes before kicking back his sleeping bag and crawling out of the tent.  He avoids looking directly at Daniel as he makes a show of stretching and working the kinks out of his neck.  Cam finds it funny just how uncomfortable he feels – he’s not a bad looking guy, and women love the uniform – because it’s not like he’s never had to turn down an advance.  But then, he’s never had to turn down an advance from a male coworker when he’s not even sure it was really an advance in the first place.

 

Cam settles himself on the ground, leaving about five feet of space between them.  The small fire sends shadows dancing over Daniel’s face.  He’s slightly behind Daniel, so when Cam opens his mouth he’s surprised to be stopped by a raised hand.

 

“Just . . . don’t.”

 

“Convincing argument, Jackson,” Cam says with more spirit than he’s feeling.

 

“I had piecharts, but I left them back at the mountain,” Daniel replies flatly.

 

Cam snorts and catches Daniel sneaking a peak at him.

 

“You’re not going to just let this go, are you?”

 

“Nope.”  Even though he doesn’t have a single clue what he’s doing.

 

Daniel sighs.  “You know, if this was Jack—“

 

“Jesus Jackson, don’t tell me you’ve had this conversation with General O’Neill too,” Cam blurts.  He flushes and is immediately grateful for the relative darkness.

 

“No,” Daniel says slowly, drawing it out like he’s talking to an especially primitive alien species of plant life.  “That’s not what I said.  I was saying that if this *was* Jack, he’d probably tilt his head and raise his eyebrows, and I’d tilt my head and raise my eyebrows back, and that would be it.  We’d never have to talk about it again.”

 

“Ah.  The whole thing where people are so close that they can communicate entire conversations with a single look.”  A level which he sometimes thinks he’ll never achieve with his team.  But he only admits that on the bad days.  The *really* bad ones.

 

“Well . . . more like the thing where apes mimic each other.”  Daniel is smirking and Cam feels something ease in his chest, a tightness he isn’t even aware of until just now.

 

“I’m not him, you know,” he hears himself say, and dammit that’s the *third* O’Neill-related insecurity he’s let loose in front of Jackson and he’s pretty sure Jackson can’t keep missing or ignoring them.  But Daniel surprises him again.

 

“I know,” Daniel says simply with none of the regret or disappointment that Cam’s been bracing himself for over the last two years.  “It’s okay.  It’s . . . good.”  And then he says something that leads Cam to believe Daniel’s been paying a lot more attention than he realizes.

 

“It’s not just you, you know.  We ignored Jack’s orders half of the time.  He just learned to live with it.  Eventually.  I think.”

 

And it’s embarrassing how much of a relief it is to hear someone say that.  So embarrassing that instead of taking the reassurance with grace, he switches back to their original topic.

 

“But you never kissed him.”

 

Cam braces himself for Daniel’s anger, but Daniel just sort of slumps and there’s something that almost sounds like amusement in his voice when he says, “No I didn’t.”

 

“So…”

 

“So?”

 

He’s starting to feel like a fifteen year old on his first date.  Heart skipping, sweaty palms, and completely tongue tied.  “Dammit Jackson—“

 

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Daniel interrupts, a hint of frustration coloring the amusement.

 

“Well that makes two of us,” Cam says, but he’s lying because he knows exactly what he wants Daniel to say.  That he was angry and frustrated and worried about Vala and maybe even *thinking* about Vala and things got out of hand and it will never *ever* happen again.  Because if Daniel says anything other than that, Cam isn’t sure how to deal with it.

 

“I’m sorry.  If anyone had seen . . .” Daniel trails off, the rest of the sentiment unnecessary.  If anyone had seen, it could have had career-ending consequences for Cam.  You have to be fairly open-minded to deal with working at the SGC, but there is a difference between accepting that humans on another planet use cat guts as an aphrodisiac, and accepting that your military CO is engaging in homosexual behavior on the gym floor.

 

He hasn’t received any threatening emails, no bad words scrawled across his locker door, no one has popped out with a Polaroid yelling “Gotcha!”  Cam’s pretty sure they’re both safe in that regard.  But what he really wants to know is the ‘why’.

 

Daniel tosses away the rock he’s been playing with and sighs.  “I don’t know.  It . . .  seemed like a good idea at the time?”

 

“I don’t see how laying one on me can seem like a good idea at *any* time.”

 

“Oh, I don’t know,” comes a new, lightly accented voice.  “Sounds like a good idea to me.”

 

And fuck.  There’s Vala, standing not more than ten feet away with her hands on her hips and a dangerous grin on her mouth.  How the hell had she snuck up on them?


	11. On Curiosity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.  
> Ellen Parr

“Pleeeeeease,” Vala whines, staring down at him with a pleading expression that he thinks is reserved only for chocolate.  He’d laugh at her antics except he’s currently benching one twenty and she’s distracting from his concentration.

 

“I.”  He breathes out quickly as he pushes up.  “Said.”  His elbows lock and his arms are just beginning to tremble when he settles the barbell back in place.  “No.”

 

“Oh come on.  I already know.  I merely want some details.”

 

Cam sits up and glares at her.  The woman has no sense of decency.  Or tact.  Or privacy.

 

“How many times do I have to say ‘no’?”

 

“Until you start saying ‘yes’,” she replies cheekily.  Cam gets up and grabs a towel.  He’s obviously not going to get anything done in here, maybe a jog topside—

 

“I can see why he couldn’t resist.  You do look particularly sexy with a fine sheen of sweat—“

 

“Vala!” he interrupts, cursing as several heads turn their way.  He grabs her elbow and begins to steer her out of the room.  “Not here,” he hisses.

 

Vala lets herself be tugged out into the hall.  “Oh, don’t worry.  I won’t tell anyone.  I’m well aware of your military’s ridiculous policy on same sex relationships and—ow!”

 

He yanks her onto the elevator before she can draw any more attention to them.  “Please keep your voice down.”

 

“Sorry.”  She glances around the elevator and whispers, “Can you tell me now?”

 

Cam grits his teeth.  “No.”  There is a brief silence and then,

 

“Now?”

 

The elevator doors open and Cam storms out toward his quarters, scattering some airmen waiting to get on.  “No,” he calls without looking back. Vala dodges between the startled airmen and almost has to run to keep up with Cam.  He waits just inside his door, gesturing for her to enter.  He shuts the door, intending to give her a long hard speech about respecting people’s privacy but when he turns around she’s *right there* and so he grabs her around the waist and covers her mouth with his own and maybe it will at least distract her from her task and Jesus how did he go so many days without doing this again?

 

Vala wastes no time tugging his shirt over his head and her cool fingers gliding over his heated skin make him shiver.  She murmurs in appreciation and Cam finally gets his hands on her ass, pulling her tight against him.  Vala has the most perfect ass and sometimes he regrets that the SGC has tamed her into wearing BDU’s instead of the leather she is so fond of.

 

He tips his head to the side as her teeth and lips worry at his jaw.  He squeezes her ass and groans at the added pressure against his cock.  Vala’s fingers slide up into his hair and somehow manage to find a hold in the short strands.  In the dirtiest voice he’s ever heard she says, “Was it hard, or soft?”

 

When he realizes that she’s still asking about Daniel he tries to jerk away but she holds his head with surprising strength.  He tries to growl a warning but it’s cut off by his own surprised gasp when one of her hands plunges under the waist of his sweats and her cool fingers wrap around his cock with firm confident strokes.  Cam feels his knees wobble as Vala’s lips return to his ear.

 

“Now, now.  It’s a simple question.  Hard, or soft?”

 

This is so wrong.  This is so wrong in so many ways, but his dick is *way* ahead of his brain and he can’t help but picture Daniel hovering over him, can’t help but remember Daniel’s thigh pressed firmly against his balls.

 

“Hard,” he chokes out.

 

Vala’s soft laugh flutters against his neck.  “That’s my Daniel.  Such a pushy boy.”

 

And Daniel had pushed him—to the floor, held down by the weight of Daniel’s body.  Oh God, whatever he does, he’s not going to think about Daniel’s body.  He’s straight, totally straight, and this raging hard on is solely because of Vala’s hand down his pants and her tongue making circles on his skin and it has nothing to do with Daniel.  Except suddenly Daniel is all he can think about and that’s unacceptable.  Cam grabs Vala’s shoulders and pushes, turning and pinning her against the door.  She struggles, but he’s not playing around and she eventually gives up.

 

“Don’t ever do that again,” he pants, still trying to catch his breath and rein in his scattered thoughts.

 

“But didn’t you like it?”

 

“No!”  He pauses.  “Yes.  Yes and no.”  It’s easy to tell from Vala’s expression that she doesn’t understand at all.  Cam lets her go and backs away, scrubbing a hand over his face.

 

“Whatever happened between me and Daniel, you need to let it go.  It was nothing.”

 

Vala crosses her arms.  “I don’t believe you.”

 

He crosses his arms back at her.  “Why not?”

 

Her eyes make the slow journey down his body and stop at his crotch.  He’s still hard, which is obvious through the sweatpants, and Vala arches one eyebrow as if she’s just made her case.

 

“This is because of you,” he protests.

 

She pushes away from the door and saunters toward him.  “While it may be true that one touch from me can send men crazy with uncontrollable desire, it’s also true that the human body cannot become physically aroused if the person is thinking about something . . . unpleasant.” Vala doesn’t stop until their crossed forearms bump against each other.  “*That* is why I don’t believe you.”

 

He doesn’t really have a valid argument against that at the moment, and there’s a small part of him that’s worried she might be right.  Most of the rest of him, however, is annoyed and trying not to freak out.  Cam pushes past Vala and opens the door.

 

“You need to go now.”

 

“Oh please.  You dragged me in here and now you’re kicking me out?”

 

“I’ve got something to take care of.”

 

Vala smirks.  “I’m sure you do.”

 

Cam rolls his eyes.  “Out, Vala.  Now.”

 

Her smirk falters but she covers nicely.  “Very well.  I’m sure Daniel can provide suitable amusement.”

 

He grabs her wrist just as she’s about to go through the door.  He tells himself that it’s for Daniel’s sake.  He tells himself it’s not because of the sudden image burning in his brain, of Daniel and Vala, of Vala touching Daniel the way she’s just been touching him.  Of Daniel touching back.  Dammit.

 

“Colonel?” Vala asks after his silence has stretched on too long.

 

“Don’t,” he says, because he can’t bring himself to actually say anything more.

 

She scrutinizes him for a moment and gently pulls her arm free.  “You’ll have to do better than that,” she says softly and he lets her go because she’s absolutely right.  He watches her walk away and wonders when he became such a dickhead.

 


	12. On Technicalities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Technically speaking, anything over seven inches cannot legally be referred to as a 'wiener'  
> Anonymous

Daniel catches him as they’re coming out of the briefing room.

 

“Mitchell.  Can I talk to you for a minute?”

 

It’s not so much a request because Daniel immediately turns and heads down the corridor without looking back and Cam has no choice but to follow, if he wants to find out what’s going on.

 

Daniel leads him to the supply room, of all places.  He stoutly ignores the part of his brain that is cackling _You and Daniel are in the closet_.  He does leave the door open, though.

 

“What exactly did you tell Vala about . . . you know.”

 

You know?  That’s the best the linguist in Jackson can do?

 

“Well, I told her it was nothing and to drop it.”

 

“And that’s it.”

 

“Yeah.  Yes.”

 

“Are you sure?  There wasn’t anything else?”

 

“Not about . . . you know.  Not technically.”  Cam immediately gives himself a mental slap.

 

Daniel frowns and blinks rapidly.  Those new glasses *do* look really good on him.

 

“What did you say, technically?”

 

“Ah, well, technically?  I’d rather not say?” he tries.

 

Daniel grins and Cam feels an unpleasant chill run down his spine.  He hadn’t let Daniel get away with that when they were off world.  “Oh no.  You owe me one.  What did you tell her?”

 

“Well, there was ‘get out’ and ‘now’ and ‘don’t ever do that again’.”

 

“What does that have to do with me?”

 

Cam puts up his hands.  “Trust me, Jackson.  You don’t wanna know.”

 

And that might be the worst possible thing to say, because in the five seconds between when he stops talking and when Jackson starts, it seems an endless plethora of possibilities begin running through Daniel’s mind.

 

“What did she *do*?”

 

Daniel takes a step forward and Cam retreats, bumping into a shelf full of toilet paper.  One of the rolls topples over and rolls between them.

 

“Jackson—“

 

“What did she do?”

 

And here he is again, trying to avoid answering Daniel’s question, while Daniel gets upset and advances on him.  He wonders if he’s actually just having a flashback to the gym.

 

“Whoa, there, Jackson.  You’re giving me a serious case of the déjà vus.”

 

At that, Daniel completely and suddenly stops in his tracks and flushes bright pink.  Huh.  “Oh God.  Sorry.  You uh, may have noticed that I’m not exactly dealing with this, well . . . *well*.”

 

Cam can’t help but feel a little sorry for the guy.  “Look.  Vala just tried to get a little fresh with me, and she brought it up.”  He winces at his phrasing but Jackson doesn’t seem to notice the unintentional double entendre.

 

“So she tried to bribe you with, uh . . . herself, to get you to spill?  About what happened, I mean,” Daniel adds quickly, and Cam thinks that he did notice the double entendre after all.

 

“Not exactly.  She was, well, kind of in the middle of it—getting fresh—and she . . .”  He’s never been good with subtle.  “Oh hell, Jackson.  She had her hand down my pants and started talking about you and the kiss to try and get me off.”

 

He feels momentary relief at having actually said it, and then a brief surge of panic that the door is open and someone could have heard, and then, well, something he can’t even describe as Daniel’s mouth opens and “Did it work?” comes flying out.

 

Daniel claps his hand over his mouth, belatedly stopping the flow of words.  Cam is rooted to the spot as he replays the last ten seconds in his mind to check that yeah, he really said that, and yeah, Daniel really said that, and yeah, holy fuck, Daniel really said that.

 

“I think,” Cam starts carefully, “that this is the part of the conversation where I ask you if you’ve come into contact with any Goa’uld symbiotes/alien drugs/kasa/body switchers but I’m afraid to ask because I think the answer’s going to be no.”  _Don’t ask, don’t tell_ , his brain sing-songs at him.

 

Daniel’s still standing there with a weird expression on his face and it’s making Cam nervous.  “You don’t *want* me to ask, do you Jackson?”

 

Daniel lowers his hand and opens his mouth, then seems to realize he’s said more than enough for today and shakes his head no.

 

“Well then.  I guess I’ll just go.”  He pretends he’s not waiting for Daniel’s small nod of agreement before leaving the supply room.  It’s not until over an hour later that he remembers it was Daniel who dragged him into the closet in the first place, concerned about what Vala knew.


	13. On Discomfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Discomfort is very much part of my master plan.   
> Jonathan Lethem
> 
>  
> 
> Comfort zones are most often expanded through discomfort.  
> Peter McWilliams

Cam sits down on a rock, lets his cap fall to the ground, and pinches the bridge of his nose.  He cannot believe he is trapped in a cave.  Well, a caved-in mine, really.

 

What is more unbelievable, or perhaps more believable given the amount of irony they are forced to face everyday in their work, is who he is trapped in the cave with.

 

A disturbingly polite Vala, who’s been running around in the small space laying out their clothes to dry and worrying about rations and possibly a way to “brighten up” the place, and a near silent Daniel who quickly abandons the cave paintings to draw hieroglyphs in the dirt with a pen.  Cam suspects they are off-color jokes.

 

Vala wraps herself in a blanket and despite his mood Cam hasn’t failed to notice that her bra and underwear are not among the bits of clothing left out to dry.  Daniel’s shirt is laid out beside Vala’s socks and Cam also hasn’t failed to notice that Vala hasn’t made a single bare-chested Daniel remark.  Frankly, he’s shocked

 

Cam still has his soggy clothes on.  Vala stops bothering him about it shortly after he growls at her.  They should be home by now, where they can be left to tactfully ignore each other, not stuck in a small cave half-dressed with only one blanket between them.  He wonders if Sam and Teal’c have found themselves in a similar situation, but then realizes that this is the kind of thing that happens to him, and not to them.  They’re probably back at the SGC with their feet up, sipping hot chocolate and – no, they’re probably frantically scouring the surrounding area for traces of him and Daniel and Vala.  But he wants to revel in his misery for a few minutes more.

 

Jackson’s pen scritches in the dirt again and Cam finds himself on his feet and halfway across the cave before he’s caught up short.  What the hell is he doing?  He tries to take a deep breath and unclench his fists, but Daniel looks up at him with an innocent expression and he sees red all over again.

 

“Will you *stop* that?” he shouts.  Daniel frowns and opens his mouth, but Cam has already moved on to Vala.  “And you.  The breeze you’re creating with all your running around is not going to be enough to dry the clothes, so you might as well sit down and—“  He bites the inside of his cheek hard, and wonders if he shouldn’t have bitten his tongue instead.  He is two seconds away from telling Vala to shut the hell up, which in this galaxy earns him a kick in the balls at the very least.  Apparently, the mine they fell through was actually an entrance to an alternate universe, because *this* Vala is staring at him with wide glistening eyes and – shit.  She scurries over to Daniel and settles herself on his rock.

 

“I was only trying to help,” she whispers, and lets out a pathetic sob.  Daniel sighs and wraps his arm around her shoulder, looking up at Cam with an expression that seems to say ‘Look what you did now and thanks, by the way, for leaving me to deal with it.’

 

Cam can feel his teeth grinding down to stumps.  As sorry as he is, he can’t seem to bring himself to apologize, or to prevent the unusually strong and overwhelming annoyance brewing in the pit of his stomach.  Part of him is starting to wonder why he feels so upset, but the other part of him quickly stands up and beats that other part down.

 

And that’s when it hits him, no pun intended.

 

“Jackson,” he says, feeling his short nails digging into the palms of his hands.  “Did we eat or drink anything while we were making nice with the natives?”

 

Daniel scuffs the heel of one boot against the toe of the other while Vala whimpers and tries to wind herself around him in an unusual and completely unsexy way.

 

“Jackson!” he barks, and there, Daniel’s looking at him with vague comprehension.

 

“Uh, no.  I don’t think so.”

 

He’s got to do better than that.  “You’ve got to do better than that,” he says harshly, knowing that he didn’t mean to say what he was thinking, but it puts a spark of annoyance in Daniel’s eyes and Cam feels strangely relieved to see it.

 

“Ceremonial tea, sacrificial wine, finger foods, come on Jackson, *anything*.”

 

Cam would find the slow dawning comprehension comical if it wasn’t emerging with a side of ‘oh dear, just how screwed are we?’.  Daniel’s eyes widen slightly and his back straightens as his eyes dart around the cave.  He shoves Vala, maybe a little too hard and she lands on the ground with a muffled thump and a wounded look.  Cam tries to feel bad when he lets the smirk slip through, just a little.

 

Daniel pins Cam with a sure look.  “No.  We didn’t eat or drink anything that we didn’t bring with us.”

 

“Something in the air?”

 

“Impossible to tell for sure, but we’ve been here for almost two days.  It would have affected us much sooner, don’t you think?”

 

“Well how long have we been ‘affected’?”  He’s telling himself not to sound so damn pissy, but it’s a losing battle.

 

“Honestly, I didn’t realize until just now.”

 

“Well that’s just swell.”  And here Daniel was supposed to be the sensitive, self-aware one.

 

“What you are you two talking about?”  Vala stands, trying pull the survival blanket back around her body.  “We’ve got bigger things to worry about than what we ate for breakfast.  Like how we’re going to get out of here, and what we’re going to eat if we don’t!”

 

It’s the rising note of panic in her voice that gets him to cross that final line.  In two steps he’s got her, and the blanket is laying in the dirt and his fingernails are white around her biceps and her struggles are reminiscent of other times she’s been pressed up against him and he wonders if he’s supposed to be enjoying it because something’s a little . . . off.

 

A heavy hand lands on his shoulder, fingers pressing close enough to his throat to be considered threatening, but he’s fascinated by the way Vala’s skin whitens and reddens under his grasp and the heat of Daniel at his back, silent but warning nonetheless.  The ‘off’ turns to ‘on’ and he shuts his eyes against an entirely pleasurable image of Vala on her knees, mouth bruised, eyes begging.  Cam swallows.  What would Daniel do if he squeezed Vala just a little bit harder—

 

God.  He practically flings himself away and into the wall, doubling over because he’s going to be sick.  Daniel was right when he said they hadn’t eaten anything, because when Cam’s stomach bucks it comes up empty, and he dry heaves for a moment until the thought of looking at his teammates doesn’t make him want to poke his own eyes out.

 

Vala is wrapped in her blanket again, huddled against the far wall, which really isn’t all that far considering the size of the space they’re trapped in.  She shivers and glances away when he finally gets his eyes to meet hers.  His gaze moves quickly to Daniel, who stares back for a beat until the strange fire in his eyes begins to fade and he’s left with a curiously blank expression.  He *knew* Daniel had been about to rip his head off moments ago—what the hell happened?

 

Cam runs his hands through his hair in frustration, tries futilely to wipe the water off on his pantlegs.  Christ, he’s still soaked and . . .

 

That’s it.

 

The rain.  “The rain,” his mouth echoes.  He feels suddenly and stunningly clearheaded.  And like he might heave again.  “The rain.  That’s why the villagers wouldn’t go out.  They warned us—shit Jackson, they warned us not to go outside!  Fucking something in the fucking rain!”

 

He didn’t know that he’d be so relieved to find he’s been drugged, unintentionally or not.  Cam wants to pump his fists, maybe give Jackson a high five, but Daniel is still mostly blank.  The twitch in his eyebrow might be confusion, or might be a stroke.  Cam just can’t tell at this point.

All he can tell is that he knows why they’re all acting so weird, and now he can go about fixing it and rescuing them and leading them home because dammit he’s the leader of SG-1 and he does not rough up his female co-workers and have inappropriate thoughts about his male ones.

 

And yeah, he’s just not going to go there right now.

 

Daniel sighs and returns to his rock, and Vala jumps when Cam breathes in her direction, so he stuffs his guilt down and follows Daniel.

 

“Come on Jackson, you remember, don’t you?  We told them we were going to investigate the mines, and they kept talking about danger, and we thought they meant the mines, which, obviously, was a valid point, but they were waving at the sky.  They meant the storm—“

 

Daniel waves his hand.  “Stop . . . for a second.  I can’t—I can’t think straight.”

 

“Yes!  Hold onto that thought.  Gotta be something in the rain.”

 

“Your clothes,” Daniel mumbles.  Cam can tell Daniel is starting to drift back to weird-land.  He slaps the other man’s cheek, intending it to be light, but Daniel’s head bobbles a little.  Shit.  He’ll apologize later.

 

“Stay with me, Dr. Jackson.  What about my clothes?”

 

“Soaks into the skin,” Daniel says, and is suddenly preoccupied with tracing the veins in his forearm.

 

Well shit.  He’s been wearing his clothes – all of them – for the past hour.  He should have let Vala undress him when she’d first offered.  There.  That sounds much more like his usual self.  Doesn’t it?

 

Convinced, he gets to his feet to formulate a plan of action.  They strip down to stop the effects from getting worse and then just . . . wait until it wears off?  How long will that be?  How long are they going to be stuck down here?  He tries the radio one more time, but gets only static.  Again.

 

Cam sighs and unbuckles his tac vest and unlaces his boots, kicking them off.  His jacket and t-shirt follow, but his fingers hesitate over the button of his pants and he glances at Daniel, who’s gone back to writing in the dirt, and Vala, who clutches the blanket tighter to her body but doesn’t look any more (or less) wary of him.

 

Right.  His pants slide down his legs and he tosses them over the nearest boulder with the rest of his clothes and he’s left there, standing in his underwear and his socks and his dogtags.  He shivers and rubs his hands up and down his arms and tries not to think about stealing Vala’s blanket.  His clear-headedness must only be temporary, because he can already feel himself growing annoyed.  It’s like a fog of emotion rolling in, taking over, leaving him a step behind his own words and actions, trying to figure out why he’s saying and feeling what he is, why he’s acting like, like—

 

He whirls at a noise and finds Vala shuffling determinedly toward him.  With jerky movements she hands him the blanket.

 

“To dry off,” she whispers, folding her arms awkwardly across her chest.  He tries not to stare, stares anyway, feels guilty, feels angry for feeling guilty, stares again, and finally just turns his back as he quickly towels off.  He holds the blanket out behind him, waiting a beat after Vala snatches it back to turn around.  Her eyes flicker from him to the walls, never lingering anywhere for more than a few seconds.

 

“Thanks,” he manages to grind out.  Vala gives him a tremulous smile, which falters as he takes a step toward her.  He can feel his control slipping away each second she stands there uncertainly, thigh peeking out from the edges of the hastily wrapped blanket.  Her fingers tighten their grip.

 

“Vala?”

 

“Yes?”

 

She’s so slender.  He knows she can handle herself, that she has no problems fighting dirty, and maybe that’s the allure.  The challenge.  Seeing her finally break underneath him.  Making Daniel watch.

 

Christ.  “Get the zat.”

 

“What?  Why—“

 

“Get the zat!”

 

She scrambles toward the supplies, fumbling to bring the zat into firing position.  He takes one more step and is about to warn her to fire only once when the electricity arcs toward him.  He has one second to be relieved and one second to be annoyed that she barely hesitates before he blacks out.

 

*****

 

 

He wakes to a familiar sound, a cool breeze across his stomach, something tickling his chin, and a not-so-gentle slap on his cheek.

 

“Nrg—“

 

“There’s my sleeping beauty.  I was beginning to worry I’d have to kiss you awake or something.”

 

Cam pries open one eye and focuses on Vala.  She graces him with a grin so blinding he shuts his eye immediately.

 

“You shot me.”  His tongue feels sort of thick and fuzzy.  He wonders how long he was out.

 

“You practically begged me to.”

 

Well, he can’t argue with her there.  He tries to sit up, but is somewhat hampered by Vala’s hovering.  And it’s not concerned hovering either.  He suddenly realizes the sound that woke him was a zat being armed, and that there’s an undercurrent of tension he can sense from Vala, despite his closed eyes and her casual tone.  He stills and blinks both his eyes open, surprised to see that she’s still in her underwear, but the blanket is gone.  The zat is half-hidden behind her thigh.  She no longer seems weak and skittish, and it has less to do with the weapon and more to do with the look in her eye.

 

“You gonna shoot me again?”

 

Vala tilts her head as if considering.  “No.  I think three might be a bit much.”

 

“Excuse me!?”

 

“You woke up at one point and I felt it necessary to subdue you again.  I think it’s best that you don’t remember.  And don’t worry—“ she adds, cutting off his outraged protest.  “I made sure enough time had passed that it wouldn’t kill you.”

 

“Great,” he mumbles.  No wonder he feels like the worm at the bottom of a tequila bottle.

 

“Are you feeling any unusually violent urges toward me, Colonel?”

 

“Only the usual violent ones,” he says, and she stares until she decides he’s joking, then straightens and disarms the zat.

 

“Excellent.  Now you can help me get us out of here.”

 

Help me, she says.  “Where’s Jackson?” he asks.  Cam winces as he gets to his feet, rubbing his chest.  It’s sore like . . . well, like he’s been electrocuted.  Twice, dammit.

 

Vala points, and he turns to see Daniel shivering on the ground under the survival blanket.  Vala has made a small fire from what looks suspiciously like their fatigues.

 

“I think he’s gone into shock.  I was trying to keep him warm while I worked.”

 

“So instead of wrapping him up in the clothes, you decided to *burn* the clothes?”

 

“In case your astute sense of observation missed it, there is no wood in this blasted cave, other than the few chunks of the walkway that came down with us and they’re already used up.  Besides, it’s only the shirts.”

 

For now, his mind supplies.  The fire isn’t going to last much longer, and Daniel’s shaking is already growing worse.

 

“What were you working on?”

 

“Trying to dig us out.”  Vala gestures toward the pile of rocks that is blocking their escape, completely un-self-conscious about her lack of clothing.  There is a small dent near the top of the pile.  “I didn’t get very far once Daniel collapsed.  Now that you’re awake you can dig while I keep him warm.”

 

“Is he going to be okay?”

 

“You were shaking for awhile as well.  I think he’ll be fine once whatever it is wears off.”

 

Cam watches Vala slide under the blanket and wrap her arms around Daniel’s shoulders.  He sees Daniel’s boots by the fire, wonders if he’ll see Daniel’s pants laid out on the rocks if he dares to look, and pretends that he doesn’t even feel a little bit jealous.

 

And so instead of throwing his own pants back on, he stalks defiantly over to their blocked exit and begins to dig.  He only stops twice over the next hour.  The first time is to see if Vala is paying any attention to him at all, but she’s wrapped solidly around Daniel with her cheek tucked against his.  The second time is to put his boots – and only his boots – back on, because he creates a small landslide that nearly crushes his left foot.  And if he happens to glance over at Daniel and Vala while he ties up the laces, well, that doesn’t count.

 

Ninety minutes in Vala calls him to a halt.  “The shivering has almost stopped, but he’s colder than before it started.  I need you over here.”

 

No big deal, he thinks, taking off the boots again.  Soldiers share body heat all the time.  Never mind that most of his soldiering has taken place in countries where body heat isn’t something that anyone ever has a shortage of, but still.  Jackson’s sick.  It’s Cam’s job to make sure he makes it back home in one piece.  His job.

 

And that’s what he keeps telling himself as he slides under the blanket and up against Daniel’s cold back – and sure enough, Vala’s removed Daniel’s pants – rubbing his hand up and down the other man’s side to try and get some blood flowing again.  At some point he lulls himself into a rhythm – he starts just under Daniel’s armpit, slides across his chest, down his stomach, back up to his hip, down his thigh as far as Cameron can reach, and then back up in one smooth stroke.  When his movements become firmer, more sure, when he finds himself fitting his chest more snugly to Daniel’s back, it’s because Daniel’s not warming up and he’s worried.

 

Vala suddenly props herself up to look at him over Daniel’s shoulder.  Cam can tell she wants to say something and her hesitation bothers him.  This is Vala.  Vala isn’t afraid to say anything, no matter how ridiculous or outrageous or –

 

“About before.”

 

Oh.  That.  He’s been trying not to think about it actually.  Coward.  “Vala, I would *never*—“

 

“I know,” she blurts, and the tremulous smile she gives him has him reaching over and tugging her arm until they’re actually holding each other despite the bulk of Jackson between them.  Cam presses a kiss against Vala’s hair.

 

“You would have thought the villagers simply would have explained that the rain was evil.”

 

He chuckles.  “Your Martha Stewart impersonation was pretty scary.”

 

“Who’s Martha Stewart?” Vala asks, but they’re both distracted by the violent shudder of Daniel coming to.  They break their hold on each other.

 

Cam can’t see Daniel’s face, but he can imagine the line between his brows as he stills and asks, “Uh, guys?”

 

Vala grins and pats his cheek.  “Don’t worry.  We left your underwear on.”

 

“We . . .  Mitchell?” Daniel ventures.

 

“Jackson.”  Cam can’t figure out if he should move away or stay where he is.  Screw it.  Daniel is still a slowly thawing iceberg – and isn’t *that* the perfect metaphor for getting to know Jackson – and so he rubs his hand briskly over Daniel’s upper arm.  “How you feeling?”

 

“I could use a coffee.”

 

Another chuckle, and Cam starts to think that they’re going to be all right.  “Well, you could chew on instant grounds if you’re desperate.  We’re having a sort of . . . water problem.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“Apparently the rainwater on this planet is ev—“

 

“Drugged,” Cam butts in.  “And it made us act not quite like ourselves.”

 

“And does that have anything to do with why the three of us are cuddling naked?”

 

Cam chokes, wondering how Daniel can be so offhand about it, wondering if he’s ever found himself in this position before, maybe sandwiched between Sam and General—oh, he’s so not going there.

 

“Pfft, Daniel!  We’re nowhere near naked.  Colonel Mitchell still has his socks on.”

 

“My mistake,” Daniel grumbles wryly, but his shoulders relax.  “I hope you don’t need CPR.  The rest of this is going to be hard enough to explain in a report as it is.”

 

“I’m fine,” Cam wheezes, finding himself grinning.

 

“Speaking of hard,” Vala starts.

 

“Vala,” Daniel warns.

 

“This ground is killing my back.”

 

She shifts, getting more comfortable, Cam supposes.  But then Daniel repeats his warning, this time laced with a hint of embarrassment, and Cam begins to wonder when ‘okay’ became ‘screwed’.

 

“You know, it’s really too bad we didn’t wind up somewhere like PX3-499,” Vala says conversationally.  Daniel begins to twitch and Cam thinks that it’s a good sign his shivers are returning.  “If I could get zapped with an alien device and learn to control my reality I’d think us up a big comfy bed right now.”

 

He’s about to give another lecture on the definition of classified and top secret when Daniel says too calmly, “Vala, please move your hand.”  Daniel jerks this time and Cam’s mouth goes completely dry.  He’s not shivering because of the cold.  Vala is—

 

“That’s not what I meant.”

 

“You should say what you mean, darling.”  Vala has that husky note in her voice that he last heard in his dreams, and other than his verbal protests, Daniel isn’t moving to stop her or get away.

 

Cam grunts and bites his lip.  Yeah, Daniel isn’t trying to get away, unless you count backing his ass into Cam’s groin for a second, but he’s pretty sure that isn’t intentional.  He doesn’t want to say anything, because what if he’s reading this all wrong and Vala is just pinching him, or tickling his side.  On the other hand, if they are doing what he thinks they’re doing – and Christ, Jackson’s breath just hitched – they’re probably wondering *why* he’s not saying anything.

 

Vala’s hand creeps over Daniel’s hip and slides under the waistband of Cam’s underwear.  Before he can think to stop her she squeezes and pulls, and suddenly his pelvis is flush against Daniel’s ass and there’s no hiding the fact that he’s not exactly *uninterested* in what’s going on.

 

“Fuck,” he mutters.

 

Daniel moans.

 

“Oh fuck.”  Cam squeezes his eyes shut.  Completely fucked.

 

He lets his forehead drop to Daniel’s shoulder, a chilly reminder of why they’re in this situation, as Vala’s fingernails dig into his skin.  She winds her legs between Daniel’s, between his, and he still can’t bring himself to open his eyes when she says, “Come on Daniel.  We’re going to warm you up.”

 

And while he knows that he hasn’t actually agreed to anything, he’s not exactly fighting it.  And maybe more importantly, neither is Jackson.  Daniel does, however, have his arm wrapped around Vala’s waist, and not Cam’s, his face pressed against Vala’s neck, and not Cam’s, his hips jerking forward—well, his hips are actually going forward and back, but Cam has nearly convinced himself that the real intent is *forward* and *not* back.  He’s not sure if he feels relieved or left out.

 

He has a stubbornly strong sensory memory of Daniel from the gym – sweat and heat and a thigh between his own, and lips, and a hint of tongue but that just might be his own imagination.  He’s tried not to think of it, not beyond, ‘what the hell’, but it’s hard to brush off someone like Daniel.  Especially when all six feet of him is squirming like he is now.

 

Cam takes a deep breath to calm his libido, but succeeds only in inhaling the scent of Daniel’s skin and his cock jumps.  Daniel murmurs something into the crook of Vala’s shoulder and Cam wonders if he’s getting a reaction, and if so, is it good or bad.  Hell, Daniel is the one who kissed him, he shouldn’t even be worrying about this.

 

Except he is.  And at so many different levels all at the same time.

 

And then Daniel goes very still and says, “You’re thinking so loudly my head is starting to hurt,” and he’s not talking to Vala because she’s busy trying to keep her eyes from rolling back in her head.  Cam can’t see what Daniel is doing with his hand, but he can see the muscles in Daniel’s arm clenching and the air around them is beginning to smell like sex.

 

Cam clears his throat a few times just to get his vocal cords to start working again.  “Truthfully, Jackson, I’m just trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing back here.”  He bites his lip, immediately regretting his choice of phrasing and waits for Vala to say something sarcastic.

 

It’s Daniel, however, sounding both annoyed and amused who says, “You’re a pretty fast learner.  I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

 

And by God, if that isn’t the invitation he’s been waiting for.  But the fact remains that he still doesn’t have a goddamned clue what he’s supposed to do.  Is there some sort of etiquette he’s supposed to follow?  Guidelines?  Rules?  First Contact: Gay Sex 101?

 

Vala evidently has enough of his wavering.  “Oh for all that’s holy,” she mutters, and rears up and over Daniel’s chest, pushing Daniel half on Cam and Cam on his back.  She grabs the back of Cam’s neck and kisses him hard, thrusting her tongue into his mouth and stealing his breath.

 

One of his arms is trapped beneath Daniel’s weight, but the other one immediately snakes around Vala’s waist.  He can feel Daniel’s arms, his hands, and suddenly they’re working in concert, fingers tangling as they push Vala’s underwear over her hips and down her thighs.  Daniel’s fingers, while still cold and clumsy, immediately hone in on her clit, if the squeal she lets out is any indication, and between all the ‘goddamn’ and the ‘holy hell’ Cam pauses to wonder if they’ve done this before.  He feels a tiny prickle of jealousy because despite all the rumors, Vala’s never led him to believe that she is actually *involved* with Jackson.

 

Then again, she’s never said she *isn’t*.

 

He abruptly realizes that Vala has stopped kissing him.  “Welcome back,” she whispers.  “You know, we’re trying to save Daniel’s life here.  If your lack of focus is any indication, we won’t get the poor darling above room temperature.”

 

Cam is sharply aware of the rising heat of Daniel’s skin.  He’s pretty sure Daniel is already on his way to passing the room temperature mark, but all he can do is stare dumbly at Vala’s mouth.  Then the mouth says, “Tell you what—I’ll take the bottom, you concentrate on the top.”

 

Of what?

 

Before he can ask, Vala is sliding down, disappearing under the blanket.  He looks to Daniel for help, and—

 

Oh.  The top.

 

Of Daniel.

 

Daniel, who currently has his eyes closed and his mouth open in the classic and enthusiastic expression of a man about to have his dick sucked.

 

Oh.  God.

 

He stares, because Daniel is starting to pant, and groan, because the blanket has dragged down far enough to reveal a pebbled nipple, not that he’s never seen Daniel’s nipples before, but he’s never been close enough to touch.  He stares because he’s seen his own face during sex and he’s one hundred percent certain he’s never looked that hot.  He stares because Daniel’s tongue swipes over his lip and it feels like it swiped right up Cam’s cock and maybe he’s not quite as straight as he always thought.

 

They passed ‘flimsy excuse’ a few miles back, and Vala isn’t even touching him anymore and he’s hard enough that he figures he could drill them right out of this cave except now he doesn’t want to because he knows exactly what he *does* want.

 

Cam works himself out from under Daniel and props himself up with one elbow by Daniel’s head.  “Jackson.”  He shakes his head and starts again.  “Daniel.  Look at me.”

 

Eyes open without hesitation, all traces of blue gone.  He moves his free hand over Daniel chest and Daniel’s eyes follow, but Cam lets out a quick “Uh uh” and Daniel’s gaze flies back to his.  He marvels at the obedience, wonders if Daniel is always this compliant during sex, and then part of him squeals like a teenage girl at the thought that he just might get to find out.

 

Cam lowers his hand, feels the already warm skin heat at his touch.  His fingers brush over one nipple and Jackson blinks but doesn’t look away.  And there’s that damn tongue again.  Fuck it.

 

His hand slides up to curl possessively around Daniel’s shoulder as he lowers his mouth.  Daniel goes very still, holding his breath, and Cam senses that even Vala has stopped moving, wonders if she’s watching them, wonders what she thinks of it.  Then there’s the taste of Daniel, and his bottom lip catching between Cam’s teeth, and a soft feminine murmur of appreciation and Cameron growls and grinds his erection into Daniel’s hip and wonders why the hell they waited so long for this.

 

Daniel’s hand wraps tightly around his bicep and Cam thinks for half a moment that he’s about to be pushed away, but then Daniel groans helplessly into his mouth, and he *is* pushing, but he’s also got Cam’s arm in a vise grip holding him close and his back is arching off the ground and—

 

Cam tears away to turn his eyes down Daniel’s body, to where the blanket has slipped down, to where Vala is apparently sucking Daniel’s wonderful brain out through his cock.  He watches it disappear between Vala’s lips, and then reappear glistening with saliva.  God.  Damn.

 

Daniel squeezes him closer, grunting against the back of his neck, but Cam can’t drag his eyes away.  Vala runs her fingernails down Daniel’s stomach and Cam finds his own breath stuttering.  He can hear Daniel whispering again his skin, some of it in English, some of it in what Cam suspects is Abydonian.  Vala’s eyes meet his, and even with her mouth full she somehow manages to grin and wink at him.  He can’t help it.  His face grows hot, but he lets out a bark of laughter.  This could be fun.  Cam turns back to Daniel.  No, this definitely *is* fun.

 

“She’s going down on you like a pro, Jackson.  How does that feel, all that suction and tight.  Wet.  Heat.  Bet the top of your head’s about to blow off.”

 

Daniel’s mouth drops open and Cam can’t help but imagine what his own cock would look like sliding over that pouty bottom lip.  He’s leaking steadily, smearing precome over Daniel’s hip and he doesn’t really want to come from humping Daniel’s leg like a puppy, but he’s not sure he can stop at this point.

 

“Jesus Jackson, did you know you have lips made for sucking cock?”  He doesn’t really mean to say that out loud, but the heat directed at him when Daniel pries his eyes open makes up for any embarrassment he’s feeling.  And makes him wonder if he shouldn’t have said it sooner.  Like, 6 months ago.

 

“Go.  Fuck.  Yourself,” Daniel pants out, grinning.

 

The shock of hearing Daniel curse obviously short circuits his brain, because he growls out, “Actually, I was thinking of fucking you.”  And yeah, didn’t mean to say that either.

 

Daniel’s eyes widen in surprise, and Cam’s thinking ‘yeah, that’s right, I said it’ and suddenly-maybe-not-really-but-probably trying not to panic just a little.

 

Vala abruptly sits up and says, “Now now gentlemen, play nice.  Besides—ladies first,” and she’s crawling up Daniel’s torso and pulling Cam’s head toward hers and whoa, so that’s what Daniel tastes like.  Salty and bitter and Christ, he can’t believe how hot it is, knowing where Vala’s mouth has just been.

 

She shimmies in between them as he explores her mouth, licking up all traces of Daniel, and struggles with the clasp on her bra for a good thirty seconds before he realizes it does up in the front.

 

“Shit,” he mutters, leaning back to get a look.  He can hear both of them laughing at him.  “That’s right, make fun of the new guy.  Just wait ‘til I—yes!”  The clasp opens and he flings the cups to the side, immediately dipping his head to take one nipple in his mouth.  Vala’s laugh stutters into a gasp and Cameron smiles against her skin.  “Told ya,” he taunts, and Vala cuffs him lightly on the back of the head before her fingers dig into his short hair to pull him back to her breast.

 

His fingers collide with Daniel’s as they explore the expanse of Vala’s skin.  Daniel’s hand slides up and around his forearm for a moment, squeezing.  He wonders how, after two years and hundreds of mission reports, he can still be surprised by Daniel’s physical strength.  And by the jolt it sends down his spine to his balls.  Because he never imagined he’d be turned on by the idea of a partner who could hold him down at will, and Bridget Neilson when he was fifteen doesn’t count.

 

Daniel is whispering, and from the corner of his eye Cam catches Vala nodding and the next thing he knows they’re shifting, pulling away a fraction, and Vala’s leg goes back to rest on top of Daniel’s hip and his fingers are spiderwalking down Vala’s stomach before he even realizes what he’s doing.  Cam pauses for a second, letting his fingers circle Vala’s bellybutton while he tries to sort his head out from his cock.  Does he want this?  *Really* want this?

 

Hell yes.

 

And that seems to be all the convincing he needs and just maybe now he can stop thinking about everything and just feel it.

 

There is crisp hair beneath his fingertips, and warmth, and wet, and Vala’s stomach clenches at his touch and he slides down just in time to brush against Daniel’s cock as it slides inside Vala.  He doesn’t even contemplate pulling away.  Instead, the heel of his hand presses against Vala’s clit and he spreads his fingers to accommodate Daniel, squeezing to create extra friction.

 

And instead of feeling left out, the thought that begins circling in his brain is _I’m going to make Vala come.  And I’m going to make Daniel come too_.  So he squeezes his fingers a little tighter and there’s a hiccup to Daniel’s rhythm that has him grinning against Vala’s breast.  She hums and holds him tighter and as much as he would love to give one hundred percent attention to what his hand is doing, he’s never been comfortable with keeping his mouth shut.  Fortunately for him, this is one of those times when silence is not required.

 

“Bet you love this, don’t you?” he says, teeth nipping at Vala’s jaw, and even though she has her eyes closed and head thrown back against Jackson’s cheek, he can still see the crinkle at the corner of her eye, her mouth.  “Bet you’ve been fantasizing about this for weeks, haven’t you?  All alone in your bunk in the mountain, lights out, fatigues undone, hands sliding underneath some lacey number—“

 

“Not lacey,” Daniel cuts in with a gasp and surprises him.  “Red.  Bikini.  Practical.  Nice,” he growls before burying his head in the side of Vala’s neck.

 

Cam chuckles.  “Alright.  Hands sliding underneath some nice practical red number.  Bet you’re already wet.  Bet you’ve been walking around wet all day, thinking about us, about our hands on you, touching you, holding you down, sliding into you.  Bet you—“

 

Again, it is Jackson, and not Vala, who jumps in with a sarcastic remark.  “Bet you can’t do more with that mouth than talk,” he mumbles.

 

“Come on Jackson, I’m trying to get in a little dirty talk here.”

 

Daniel finally raises his head to look at Cam, even though the movement of his hips never stops.  Vala still has her eyes shut and a blissful smile on her face, like she’s completely unaware of everything around her.

 

“I have to listen to you talk all day.  Right now I’d just like to fuck.”

 

Oh, if all those hero-geek-worshipping underlings could see Dr. Daniel Jackson now.  Scratch that.  Cam doesn’t want anyone *ever* to see Daniel like this.  Because this?  This belongs to *him*.

 

He stares Daniel down, sees the usual defiance, the almost-but-not-quite arrogant tilt to his head.  Sees the bead of sweat rolling over Daniel’s cheekbone to his jaw, the way his lips begin to part.

 

“I’m not stopping you, Jackson.  And maybe, if you’re lucky, your fucking and my mouth could find some common ground.  If you’re lucky,” he repeats, voice hard with a promise of . . . something.  Cam came to the SGC willing to set aside his ego, to work with SG1, to be another cog in the wheel until they got to know him, got to trust him, got to believe that maybe he did know what he was doing.

 

He’s tired of waiting.  The mountain may be big, but this caved in mine isn’t, and there’s only room for one alpha dog in here.

 

Daniel swallows and Cam pulls his hand away from where Daniel and Vala are joined, reaching for Daniel’s face.  His thumb brushes Daniel’s lips, which part without hesitation.  He holds back a smile, but even he knows the satisfaction shining from his eyes is obvious.  Daniel’s tongue darts forward, wraps around Cam’s thumb and pulls it all the way into his mouth, teeth gently scraping at the base.

 

Christ on a crutch.  He was wrong when he said Daniel’s lips were designed for sucking cock.  Daniel’s entire goddamn *mouth* is designed for sucking cock and Cam can feel his heart thudding in his dick when Daniel lowers his head and looks up at him from beneath his eyelashes.

 

Without breaking Daniel’s gaze he says, “Vala, honey.  How you doing?”

 

She purrs and arches her back, hooking her leg over Cam’s hip and her arm back around Daniel’s neck.  “I’m wonderful.  Now if you two are done talking?”

 

Daniel lets a small smile slip and Cam looks down at Vala.  He lowers his mouth to her ear.  “If y’all won’t let me talk, how am I supposed to tell you how you look, how gorgeous you both look.  Has he hit that sweet spot yet?  Probably not because you haven’t got the greatest angle even though he’s balls deep inside you.  How does it feel, him stretching you open.  You’re gonna be sore in the morning, because Jackson’s no lightweight and from the look on his face you are so very, very tight but just not.  Quite.  There.  Yet,” he emphasizes, letting his hand drift back between Vala’s thighs.  She moans and bucks against him as his fingers slowly circle her clit.  “Like that, baby?  Maybe next time I’ll use my tongue so I can watch up close and personal while Daniel f—“

 

Daniel interrupts with a loud groan, clutching at Vala’s hip.  Cam moves his hand lower to find that Daniel has slipped out of Vala, so he wraps his fingers around Daniel’s cock as he jerks and moans and is suddenly coming all over Cam’s hand, his wrist, Vala’s thigh.  He whispers in the maybe-Abydonian and buries his face in Vala’s shoulder, while Vala’s whimpers become more frantic and her squirming more purposeful.  Without a second thought Cam grabs the base of his cock and slides home.

 

Oh.  God.

 

She is tight.  She’s . . . God.  Yes.

 

Vala clutches at Cam’s back, leaving marks that he *might* be able to explain with a fall down a mineshaft, and he clutches back, grabbing Daniel’s side instead and not caring.  And before he even really realizes what’s happening Vala stiffens and groans out his name and then she’s collapsing back against Daniel, panting and sweating and completely fucking beautiful.

 

And he is still hard and desperate and inside her.

 

And Sam is yelling at him.

 

Cam cranes his neck towards his pile of clothes.  “Mitchell, come in.  I repeat, come in,” it squawks.

 

I’m trying, he thinks.  And then: fuck.

 

“Daniel.  Vala.  We’ve located your position.  Copy.  Over.”

 

Goodbye bliss.  Hello reality.

 

Despite his aching cock, Cam manages to roll away and scramble to his feet.

 

“Mitchell please respond--”

 

“Hey Sam,” he says, hoping his voice doesn’t sound weird.  Or if it does, he hopes it’s that ‘hey I just had another SG1 life or death experience’ weird and not that ‘I’ve got blue balls that would put the pope to shame’ kind of weird.

 

“Cam!  Is everyone okay?”

 

He glances over at Daniel and Vala, still sprawled out on the ground basking in the afterglow, and bites back a groan.  “Oh, we’re just peachy.”

 

“Good to hear.  I’m right above you in the mineshaft.  We’re going to try to dig you out.”

 

“Great.  See you in a few.”

 

Cam lets the radio fall to the ground as Daniel sits up.  “They’ll probably be a while, you know.  We could . . .”  He trails off, gesturing at Cam’s still half-hard cock, which twitches at the thought.

 

Hell yeah, he goes to say, but what comes out is “We’d better get dressed.”  And thank God, because when the Asgard beam surrounds them ten minutes later all Cam has to worry about is the fact that he’s still missing one boot.

 


	14. On Close Encounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Air Traffic Controller: AirEast 31, do you wish to file a report of any kind to us?   
> AirEast Pilot: [over radio] I wouldn't know what kind of report to file, Center.  
> From Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)

When Cam gets nothing more than a “hmmm” from Lam after being thoroughly poked and prodded and eyed up and having his strangely shaped bruises and cuts painfully cleaned by her nurses, he considers himself lucky.

 

When he leaves the infirmary with nothing more than a teasing reference to his missing boot—“At least it wasn’t your pants,” Sam grins as Daniel chokes—he considers himself very lucky.

 

When they appear to have convinced General Landry of their strange but distinctly non-sexual preliminary report despite only a few harried moments aboard the Asgard ship to get their stories straight, he considers himself extremely lucky.

 

And when he thinks about where he has just been, where he could be again if he plays his cards right and they ever get out of this damned briefing – well, he’s not just an extremely lucky guy.  He’s the luckiest goddamn sonofabitch in two galaxies.

 

Cam notes Daniel’s uncharacteristically relaxed slump and shifts uncomfortably.  Scratch that—he didn’t get to come.  So he’s the second luckiest guy.  He shifts again and can’t help but feel a little smug despite the wince he fights to hide.  Sam sees it anyway, narrows her eyes at him, and then tilts her head ever so slightly toward Daniel and Vala.

 

It takes a moment for Cam’s brain to comprehend what she’s frowning at.  Daniel and Vala are sitting next to each other, and there’s nothing unusual about that.  Vala’s curled up in her chair, leaning into Daniel’s space, and there’s nothing unusual about that either.  Daniel seems oblivious to Vala, and again, Cam can’t see anything out of the ordinary.  Until he squints and realizes that Daniel actually has his entire body angled toward Vala, and her lean brings her head so close to Daniel’s shoulder that she’s practically nuzzling him.  Daniel turns his head and gives her a small but sincere smile.

 

They look completely natural.

 

Which is, Cam realizes, what would seem so unnatural to Sam.  But not, apparently, to him.  Jesus, have they been sitting like that through the whole briefing?

 

He’s saved from answering the question in Sam’s eyes by the appearance of Doctor Lam.  Several things happen in quick succession at that point: Daniel straightens abruptly; Cam watches Daniel’s lips tighten; despite the small thrill he gets at watching Daniel’s lips, he has the sudden and sinking feeling that something bad is about to happen; and that as usual, Daniel is way ahead of him.

 

“Lab results are back,” Lam begins.  “Analysis of the blood work shows that there is still a significant amount of the unknown substance in the systems of all three patients.  Colonel Mitchell’s is particularly high.”

 

Any and all traces of arousal wilt away as the implications of her words set in.  “You’re saying that I’m still under the influence?  Because I feel fine.”  But even to his own ears he sounds uncertain.  Vala glances at him sharply.

 

“We’re all fine,” Vala adds.  “The effects wore off in that cave before the Asgard beamed us out.  We all saw it.”

 

Lam is unconvinced.  “SG-7 ingested a similar compound on PX3-579 several months ago.  The drug seems to interact with individual body chemistry, so even with the same dose the effects can vary.  I suspect the effects could even vary in the same person, if administered at different times.  Colonel Carter, you indicated in your preliminary report that the villagers said the effects of the rain differed for each person?”

 

“They indicated something to that effect, yes.”

 

“So physically, Doctor Jackson was hit the hardest,” Lam explains.  “Colonel Mitchell and Vala are not showing any immediate physical side effects, which leads me to believe that the substance may be affecting them behaviorally.  I’d like to restrict the three of you to the base for the next 48 hours, with check-ins every 6 hours.”

 

“Agreed,” says Landry.  “Carter, Teal’c, I’d like you to go back to the planet and see what else you can find out about this rain.  Take Captain Harwood to help with the translating.  Let’s get this straightened out as quickly as possible, shall we?  There’s a meeting with the IOC that I’d hate to have to attend because Dr. Jackson was in quarantine.  Dismissed.”

 

Cameron stands as Landry and the others leave the room.  Teal’c is the last one out, leaving them with a raised eyebrow.  Cam pretends not to notice and turns back to Daniel and Vala. 

 

“So,” he says.  “Alien influence.”  And he doesn’t mean it like ‘so, let’s chalk the whole thing up to those crazy alien drugs and pretend it never happened.’  He means it more like ‘huh, how about those crazy alien drugs.’

 

“Yeah,” Daniel replies, and Cam’s not one hundred percent certain, but he seems to be echoing the ‘huh’ sentiment as well.

 

“I don’t buy it,” Vala says and scrambles up, sending her chair crashing into the wall.  She storms out of the briefing room and Cam goes to follow but there’s a hand on his arm stopping him and he didn’t even hear Jackson get up.

 

“Let her go,” he says softly.  Daniel’s hand is warm and strong and Cam imagines he can feel Daniel’s skin on his even through the layers of his uniform.

 

“Jackson.  Don’t you get it?  She loves you, and now to find out that what happened—that you only—because of some wacky alien drugs—“

 

“I know,” Daniel says, tightening his grip and drawing Cam’s eyes to his.  Cam can feel Daniel’s breath across his mouth, can watch as the blue of his eyes slowly disappear into black.  He hopes to hell that no one walks in, because blind monks wouldn’t miss what is passing between them.  On the other hand, he could throw Daniel down on the briefing table and blame it on the drugs later.  And isn’t *that* an image he doesn’t need if he wants to walk comfortably back to his quarters.

 

Fortunately, Daniel’s next words are nearly as effective as a bucket of ice down his BDUs.

 

“Maybe we all feel that way.  A little,” Daniel adds, flushing and looking away.  His hand loosens and falls away from Cam’s arm and Cam’s brain only has time to process ‘love’ and ‘drugs’ and ‘not real’ before Daniel’s talking again.

 

“Then again, maybe *that’s* the drugs talking.  I don’t know what else to tell you.”

 

Despite everything else going on, that pings something in his brain.  “Why do you always think I’m expecting something from you?”  Daniel has expressed that particular sentiment several times, usually when he is particularly annoyed at Cam.

 

Daniel crosses his arms.  “Because . . .” Daniel takes a deep breath and Cam can’t tell if it’s to gather his thoughts or to work up some nerve.  “Because sometimes you look at me like . . . like I’m supposed to know the answer to—“

 

“Life, the Universe, and Everything?”  Cam finishes.

 

Daniel’s expression turns sheepish.  Well, as sheepish as Daniel gets, which is more like a consternated reluctance.  “Something like that.”

 

“It’s 42, by the way,” and then they’re grinning at each other, small understanding smiles that make Cam wonder if this is what addiction is.  Because if they’re still under the influence, he doesn’t want it to wear off.  He doesn’t know if he could go back to a Daniel who is distant and closed off.  To a Vala that is always just a little bit sad around the edges.

 

“So what do we do now?”

 

He’s taken aback for a second, because, hey, that’s usually his line, and of all the people he can imagine asking it, Daniel is close to last on that list.  Cam resists the urge to shrug and defer to Doctor Daniel Jackson, SG-1.

 

“We wait.  See what Sam and Teal’c come back with.  We’ll cross the rest of that bridge when we come to it.”

 

Daniel nods once, slowly, and uncrosses his arms.  When he takes a tentative step forward Cam thinks that he’s about to get hugged, but Daniel stuffs his hands in his pockets and brushes past.

 

Cam crosses his own arms to stop from reaching out, but that doesn’t stop his eyes from touching every curve and plane and angle of Daniel that they can reach.  Daniel turns suddenly in the doorway and Cam knows he’s caught.  But he doesn’t know if he’s glad or disappointed that Daniel doesn’t say anything about it.

 

“I’d tell you, if I knew them.  The answers, I mean,” Daniel says.

 

Cam feels a sudden warm rush through his body.  ‘I know,’ is on the tip of his tongue, but it’s trite, and it’s also a lie.  “Thanks,” he says instead.

 

Daniel nods and turns to go again.  “By the way, while we’re waiting, would you mind not staring at my ass?  It’s distracting.”


End file.
